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Every time I break a rule
I record it in a notebook.
I never jaywalk, litter or curse, but
the notebook is almost full.
Everyday I come home from school, grab the carrots and celery my mom has prepared for me
and sit down at my desk.
At this point, the day's events are still fresh on my mind.
So I grab my notebook
and record all the rules I've broken.
Rule number 1:
While riding in an elevator, one must talk to no one and fold his hands while looking toward the door.
Most people don't even know these rules exist, and because they don't know, they can't break them.
Unfortunately, I know all of them and sometimes I can't help but break them.
Like number 6: slippers are not to be warn after 10 PM.
But sometimes I break the rules on purpose,
just because I know that they exist.
Rule number 37: A person must own two cows in order to wear cowboy boots in public.
It's surprsing how often the rules get broken around here.
Rule number 103: It is unlawful to attempt to stop a young child from playfully jumping over puddles of water.
Rule number 273: It is illegal to whistle for a lost canary before 7 AM.
Rule Number 342: It is illegal to mistreat muscles.
Henry David Thoreau once said
"Any fool can make a rule
and any fool will mind it."
Rule Number 89: It illegal to visit a cemetery for any reason other than to visit the deceased.
Rule Number 267: It is illigal to take a bite out of someone else's HP09-burger.
Rule number 421:
It is unlawful to play golf on a public crosswalk.
Rule Number 781:
It is illegal to create a false crime scene outside of a school.
Rule Number 1000:
It is unlawful to send a list of laws one has broken to an authority figure without citing one's identity.
♫"The Village Green Preservation Society"-The Kinks♫