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>> [Music] Giving good directions helps children know
what we want from them.
There are four steps to giving good directions.
Step one, get their attention.
Make sure your child is focused and paying attention
when you give directions.
>> I think eye contact is critical especially
with our younger kids.
You know they're very stimulated by their environment
and there's a lot of things going on.
So it's really important that when we call their name
or we're trying to give them an instruction,
we wait until they're actually attending to us
and eye contact is a key component of that.
We know that they're paying attention, that they heard you,
and now they're paying attention to you
and can receive the instruction that you want to give.
>> Step two, give the direction.
When possible, tell your child exactly what you want him
to do rather than what you don't want him to do.
For example, telling your child to put the crayons
in the box clearly tells your child what to do.
If you say don't leave your art supplies out.
Your child might not know what you want him to do.
>> What we really want to do as parents, ultimately we want kids
to follow those directions.
So if there are things that we can do to make it easier
for them to follow those directions
that we should absolutely be trying those things.
That way we know when the kids are not doing what we asked them
to do we know that it's because it's intentional.
And not because they're confused
or because they don't understand.
>> Depending on your child's age, he may need time to think
about how to begin following a direction.
Step three, check compliance.
Make sure your child follows your direction.
When your child is stalling or doing something else,
he is not following your direction.
You can repeat your direction and give a warning
that a consequence is coming if he does not do as told.
>> One of the things that I tried to talk with my children
about is if you follow directions, you know you listen
to mom and dad and you follow directions, you're going
to be in pretty good shape.
You're not going to get in trouble
if you're following directions.
>> Step four, add a consequence.
A consequence is what happens
when your child does not follow directions.
If your child doesn't follow your directions,
give a consequence.
You might give your child a timeout
or take away something he enjoys.
Make it clear to your child that the consequence is
for not following directions.
After the consequence is over,
go back to being positive with your child.
Don't hold a grudge or continue to lecture your child
about following directions.
Following these steps for giving good directions will help you
connect with your child.
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