Ricky gervais

Why buy a book when you can join a library.

The grass isn't always greener on the other side!

There's no difference between fame and infamy now. There's a new school of professional famous people that don't do anything. They don't create anything.

Honor is a gift a man gives himself. You can be as good as anyone that ever lived. If you can read, you can learn everything that anyone ever learned. But you've got to want it.

Look, just tell me where that lemon came from and I'll shut up and go away.

Pol Pot - he rounded up anybody he thought was intellectual and had them executed. And how he told someone was intellectual or not was whether they wore glasses. If they're that clever, take them off...

People confuse the subject of the joke with the target of the joke, and they're very rarely the same.

Where there's a will - there's a relative!

You should make something. You should bring something into the world that wasn't in the world before. It doesn't matter what it is. It doesn't matter if it's a table or a film or gardening-everyone...