Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
Raised in small towns, we moved a lot.
I had an interesting family life growing up.
I got kicked out of kindergarten for arguing with kindergarten teacher
about a philosophical subject.
When I got a little bit older in middle school, it was nerd city, big
thick glasses.
I was like anybody, I want girls to like me, I want to be cool at school,
I want to be able to fit in, I don't want to have to worry
about the way I look.
I was born with nystagmus, which is more of a social problem for me.
I can see OK now.
It makes my eyes move back and forth and I have to compensate by moving my
head to see, and it confuses a lot of people and it makes things awkward.
It's just the way it has been for me as long as I've been around, and so
it's made me not want to be seen.
It forced me to figure out how to talk better, and I did a lot of reading.
And here I am, a communicator now on the radio, where
nobody gets to see me.
I also have something called Asberger's Syndrome, which is a very
mild form of autism, and it makes me unable to pick up on normal social
cues, people smile and wave, and I don't even notice, or something.
I'm in my own little world.
I was just not socially confident.
I'm the classic preacher's kid.
Seeing my dad preach and discuss the Bible, and then coupled with the stuff
we went through at home was difficult to reconcile, and honestly, it made me
extraordinarily skeptical about Christianity and whether I wanted to
have anything to do with it.
When I was 12, I decided I wanted to be a Christian because I didn't want
to go to hell.
That was my thought, so I decided, this is who I'm going to be.
Since then, honestly, it's been a lot less about hell than it has been about
really, actually growing in love for who Jesus is.
What's striking to me as I look back, I think, I started with some strikes
against me, with some physical limitations, and some pain, and I
encountered hypocrisy, and was aware of who Jesus was and kind of wanted to
run away intellectually from Him.
All the stuff I've been through, what's funny about is I can look back
and there's not one thing that I can look back and
say, that wasn't helpful.
There's not one thing in my life now.
I'm drawing on all of it.
At the time I had no idea, no clue.
When you're going through something, you don't know.
You just think this is pain.
It goes from why me, while you're going through it, to thank you, Lord.
I've been married for 20 years, and she's given me the confidence.
She's a gift from God.
She's given me the confidence to be in front of people, and she's made me
feel like I'm worthwhile.
Here I am, I'm a radio host, and it's like on across the country, and I
don't miss the irony of that.
I know God has taken somebody who is so skeptical, and socially awkward,
and put him in a place where he gets to speak for Him.
And I think it's because of my weaknesses, honestly.
And I'm aware of it every day.
I go in and think, I'm speaking to, maybe, hundreds of thousands of people
at any moment, and I'm very aware that I'm in over my head.
And there's no way-- it's just like anybody else who has weakness, if God
does something-- if something happens to you like that, you know it wasn't
because you're awesome.
You know it was because He did something.
I have to remind myself of that now, if I'm going through stuff, I don't
know the end of the story.
The very stuff that I was mad at God for before is the stuff I'm thanking
Him for now.
That's pretty amazing to me.
My name is Brant Hansen and I am Second.