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Attention Portland. Attention Portland.
I am a banker.
Hold your applause.
Ladies and gentlemen, there is a nasty rumor going around town that by November fourth
you should take your money our of the bank and take it to a local credit union.
This is a terrible idea.
Please do not do this.
The credit union will only treat you with kindness and dignity.
They will not invest your money on my lear jet.
If you wish to protest me you may do so with a clever sign or perhaps a funny march.
Do not hit me where it hurts, in my pocketbook.
Don't go to a credit union with all of my I mean your money, on November fourth.
Keep your money with me. Don't you love the overdraft fees?
Come on.
I am the bank.
I am too big to fail.
Disregard evidence of my malfeasance and corporate insanity.
Thank you.
I love you PDX.