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(Daylight by Maroon 5)
First off, I would like to say there are a couple reasons why
I am making this video and why I took the time to write what I want to say
instead of just winging it
This is something I've been wanting to say for a long time
I've been hiding this from a good chunk of my family
and I would have told everyone personally
but honestly I wasn't sure what kind of reaction
or response I would get and I mean this in the most
respectful manner, I didn't want any interruptions
and I figured that making a video would be more personal
than a picture me holding a sign that says I'm gay on Facebook
I wanted my whole family
including ones that live far out of california
to know this because I love
every single one of you and I want my family to know all of me
there are people who already know
of course my parents, my brother Chris
my close friends and well the obvious
my girlfriend who I've been dating for two years now
yeah she makes me happy
um now there are a couple points
I wanted to get across
just because I'm gay does not mean I would stop going to church
or make me less religious than I am
I love God I believe in him
and I still pray
to him when I need to, when I want to
and I do believe that he makes
absolutely no mistakes and he definitely
did not make a mistake when he gave me life into this world
truthfully I did feel guilty
but I did not feel guilty for the fact that
I'm gay but because I was hiding apart
of me from people I love
very very much I felt guilty
because I was ashamed of the way God made me
it drove me crazy when I hid
a good part of myself from everyone and
I even became a great liar because I felt like I had to
my parents have known about me since about like
freshman or sophomore year in high school
it was very very rough and tough from the beginning
not gonna lie I was
unhappy at the time because I tried to prove to everyone
that I was happy and proud of my sexuality
when really deep inside of me
I pray to God every day that
me being gay will just be a stage
because
my parents weren't very fond of it and there were expectations I felt like I had to
fulfill
especially me being the oldest child
it it did bring some pressure on me
then I found peace with myself and I found peace with God
and I understand that life is a gift and I shouldn't have to live it
unhappily that that is what I really
really began to accept myself
to fully accept myself I grew mature enough to realize that my parents will
love me no matter what
and after
they saw this in me and I know they noticed
the growth in me um that's when they
were able to say to themselves that alright
that my child will be okay and
and then I begin to notice
that they're getting better at tolerating it
of course things happen in the progression of time
but honestly my parents have been absolutely amazing
I love them and I am so so so grateful
to have them in my life because I know there are other people like me
that aren't as fortunate
Chris
my brother, has been genuinely awesome
about it he never disrespected me or downgraded me
in any way and he loves me no matter what
even though there's a five-year
age difference between us, he's still my best friend
and we are able to talk and laugh just about
anything I thank God everyday for him
like hes just amazing
I love him
I do have a another day another brother you know
Cameron he's five and I love him too
he is such an amazing little kid
um I know he's not old enough to understand this
but I just hope to be a great example
for him. I just hope just as a person
that he'd look up to me
as just an older figure and that you know *** orientation or anything like that
does not have to take effect. That you know, he can just
look past that and
I mean Chris did and I I'm so thankful to have them
in my life
about the girlfriend... I didn't want
to get too into it in case this was a lot to take in
but I wouldn't also be shocked
if you guys weren't shocked about this
because I thought I was pretty obvious
I just wanted to
I don't know, have some
confrontation I guess to everyone
to just give a note that hey
I'm bringing a girl home instead of a guy
but anyway I just hope
you guys can love and treat me with the same amount of respect
I've always received from you guys
I'm still me this is just apart
of me
See there's an expression I like to use and
I used it on like everything like I used it on my parents
used it on my girlfriend
or I think I told her... I don't know
anyway it's like people who are born with a favoritism
towards chocolate cake. They can't help that they like chocolate cake because
that's just a part of something that they learn about themselves
and makes them happy and for me I have an attraction towards girls
and I can't help it it's just something I've learned about myself
and you know I'm definitely happy
This is me