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Mark Gungor Yo Mama Session 2/2
All ready! Here we go!
The No.1 key to incredible sex:
Exclusivity. I can't spell.
Exclusivity. When one man focuses just on one woman.
Looking at the Song of Solomon.
Now she writes and says: "I belong to my lover and his desire is for me."
Something incredible happens when a man focuses on just one woman.
Now this is radical when I'm telling you, because
our culture today says the key to great sex is ***.
"The more you fantasize, the more you check out the hot babes, the more you're looking at *** on the internet,
uh, the better your sex life will be!"
But they are lying to you.
Our culture has completely lost its mind in this area.
And all the "experts" talk about:
"The key to incredible sex is to fantasize and to ***!"
Who is this woman? I cannot imagine her having sex, just like...
Hollywood! Hollywood. The people who can't stay married for more than three months at a time
is giving us the perfect scenario for great sex: ***, fantasy,...
But it's a big fat stinking puking lie.
It doesn't work! You say: "You're just against it 'cause you're a preacher."
No, no! I do not oppose *** on moral grounds.
I could, I could preach you to hell and back, if you wanted.
But I don't have to. It doesn't work!
At least if it worked, it would make some degree of sense, but does not
and no one challenges it today.
Have you ever read that story of the Emperor's new clothes?
How everybody went around and told the Emperor how great he looked and all was just walking around in his underwear, but all: "You're great!"
And some little kind finally says: "You know, he is naked."
I feel like that little kid.
All the experts today, they keep repeating the same lie over and over and over and over again.
And everyone just: "Oh, yes, the Emperor's clothes are magnificent!"
"Oh, yes, *** and *** and ***!"
"Oh, this is a fantastic sex when you do this." But it doesn't work.
And the proof is in the pudding! People say: "What's your proof?"
But the proof is you guys who do it!
Let me ask you guys, you guys are sitting around in the dark and check out the hot babes on the internet
sit around and yank on your wanger.
Come on you wanger yankers you know who I am talking to.
Let me ask you a question: "How's that working for you?"
You've got a great sex? You know you don't.
In fact, the more you do it, the more you indulge in it, the worse your sex life becomes.
And the prescription the world gives us is, you know: "Oh yeah, you just need more ***, you need more ***."
But it doesn't help. It keeps making it worse.
It is destroying people's lives.
In Hollywood they just don't get it, all these "experts".
I was watching this one show, this, you've seen the show "Family Feud"?
This one week they had soap opera stars on.
And I'll hand it to these people, they look great, but they're as dumb as a box of rocks.
And they asked them this one question, they said: "Hundred people survey: 'What can you do to improve your romantic life?'"
They come up to the first team: "OK, I need an answer." "Oh yeah, OK, OK, OK..."
And they come to the first person and he says: "What's your answer? What can you do to improve your romantic life?"
He goes: "Have an affair!"
And all the other rocks in the box they go: "Good answer, good answer, good answer!"
"Have an affair." How can you be so stupid and still breathe!
The way to improve your sex life is to have an affair with somebody else.
But that's the culture they live in. The more ***, the more naughties, somehow it improves.
It does not improve, it destroys.
I know psychiatrists and psychologists who had prescribed to couples
in an effort to improve their relationship: "Have an affair."
So ignorant are they that the Emperor is walking around naked.
Went over to the next, you know, they said: "Have an affair." Guy looked at him like he was nuts. OK: "Have an affair."
Went to the next rock.
"What can you do to improve your romantic life?"
"View *** together!" "Good answer! Good answer! Good answer!"
"View ***!"
Every answer they came up with was ***-based.
Three strikes. They couldn't get it.
Went over to the other box of rocks.
Same thing! I've never seen it before.
Neither side could get one answer.
That's when they've got done, he said: "Well, let's take a look." And it was like, you know:
Spend time with each other, have a romantic dinner,
take a long walk, you know, bring her flowers...
Stuff that any moron knows.
But these people don't get it. They don't get it.
The world's answer to great sex. Their formula is:
Number one: fantasize.
Oh, yeah, that's a good idea! Ignore the real woman in your life
and focus on one who would never give you the time of day.
Oh, yeah, yeah, let's do that.
Let's pretend, let's live in a fantasy world.
We're trading in real women for fantasies.
How can we be so stupid?
And this is becoming a real problem. And you know who's beginning to notice it?
A lot of people way off on the liberal left are starting to notice it.
They're starting to write about it. They're starting to realize there is a problem.
Men are becoming more and more diminished sexually.
And they're becoming unable to perform
because they have so overstimulated themselves with ***.
It is destroying them.
I've met women who've told me that their husbands prefer
*** and *** to actually making love to them.
I had a woman in my office and she's a 20-something year-old good-looking woman.
Like hoochi mama, OK?
"I didn't think pastors notice that sort of thing!"
Hey, I may be sanctified, but I'm not petrified! Alright?
A good-looking woman is a good-looking woman.
And she tells me sitting there, she says: "My husband has not touched my *** in over a year."
"Not interested." I said: "You're kidding me, so what does he want?"
"Well, he just wants me to do these weird things to him. All garbage he's got in his head through lookin' at ***."
Trading in real women for fantasies. What in the world?
So many women I've talked to in the last years they say:
"My husband admits he would rather *** than make love to me."
Fantasize and ***, well that's their idea of great sex.
And what is it with this *** thing?
In the passion to which these people rise to defend ***
as some form of great sex.
I don't get it!
I'd love to know who the first Hillbilly was and when.
"You know? That kinda looks like a ***."
And this is starting to destroy a lot of men's sex lives.
Do not fool yourselves!
There is no way in the world you can keep doing that over and over and over again
and not retrain your body!
Everybody knows this. When it comes to anything physical.
Athletes know this, they train, they do the same repetitive action over and over again
in order to train their bodies, so that their bodies will respond in a certain way.
Athletes do this. Whether it's tennis or football or whatever they train over and over again so without thinking about it, their body reacts in a certain way.
The military knows, that you train a young man to react in a certain way, they do the same drills over and over and over and over again!
Why? 'Cause you train your body. So that without thinking you act in a certain way!
How in the name of God our culture is teaching our young people from the age of 13 to start ***
two, three, five, some of them even seven times a day thinking that it will not retrain them?
The truth of the matter is that there are a lot of men today who are no longer able to function with a woman.
And I hear this all the time in the seminars. Guys who come to me
women who come to me, who tell me their husbands cannot perform.
There are a lot of men today who cannot perform with a woman.
Another guy called our office, he says: "Man, I can have sex with my wife for hours, nothing ever happens."
Incapable of achieving an ***. But he can do it by himself.
Oh, that's great! Oh, that's wonderful! Let's get all our kids doing that. Let's get them doing that.
He went to the doctor to find out what was wrong with him
and he was diagnosed as, this is not a joke, seriously, TMS, the doctor says: "You have TMS."
It's called "Traumatic masturbatory syndrome."
He has actually reconditioned his *** to certain type of stimulation. It won't respond to a real woman.
What are we thinking?
And you know what really fries my Puerto Rican pancakes?
It's when they say: "This is how you can achieve ***."
"You *** until you achieve ***." And they tie the words *** and *** together.
They are crazy!
You cannot achieve an *** through ***!
You can ***. You can have something physically happened to you, but it is not an ***.
An *** is when you're making love to a woman
and you reach your peak and endorphins are released into your bloodstream
and every cell in your body stands up and grabs the hand of the cell next to it and goes: "Halleluia!"
That is an ***!
Almost universally people report that when they *** they immediately feel the opposite.
Icky, dirty or guilty.
And psychologists have been telling us for decades now: "Oh, you do not have to feel guilty about ***, it's fine!"
I know Christian pastors who tell their young people: "You don't have to feel guilty about maturbating, it's fine!"
I know psychologists: "You don't have to feel guilty, it's fine!"
I'll tell you what: you can fool your mind, but you will never ever ever fool your body!
And there are a lot of men today, I believe, who have never achieved an ***.
They ***, but that's all they do. They're so trained that...
You cannot get your body doing this over and over and over again and think you can function normally.
All that have trained their bodies to *** they'll never really achieve an ***.
Oh, that's great! Oh, that's wonderful!
Let's get all our kids doing that!
The misinformation our kids are getting today, and a lot of you have gotten it.
But dear God, our kids are gettin' in spades.
The misinformation is going to rack their sex lives. It has the potential to rack their sex lives for the rest of their lives.
And nobody is telling you what I'm telling you right now!
Most preachers don't like talking about this stuff. It freaks them out. As you can tell I have no such problem.
And I understand that we've got to start talking about this stuff.
We're trying, in the church, we're trying to win an argument but we let the other side talk!
We're tryin' to win a war, but we only let the other side to have bullets.
And now we wonder why 50% of the men in our congregations have *** addictions.
That's the number, 50%. In our congregations, churchgoing men, *** addictions!
You have to understand something: *** will rob you of great sex.
The reason why such a temptation is because we think it's great sex.
"Oh, you wanna check out that baby, oh if you get online! I have greater sex! I have greater sex! "
That's what sucks us in! With the promise of great sex. But it is a lie! I promise you!
The more you do it, you know, the ones of you who do it.
The more you do it, the opposite happens. They are lying to you.
I'm telling you, the lies that this generation has faced and is continuing to face along *** information...
There are so many blatant lies along this line!
We have lost our minds in this country! It is destroying people's lives.
You know what the biggest problem is we're having today in America? Sexless marriages.
Sex? People do not wanna have sex.
Don't have to have sex. They have sex with themselves.
Well, that's great! Yeah, you know, that's trading a real woman for a fantasy one.
Remember that little diagram I gave you last night? We got the heart and the smiley face?
And that motivates that? When you ***, it breaks the system.
"You don't be nice to her. Don't pay attention to her."
So self-centred men, lazy, for a quick release become lovers to themselves
instead of lovers of women.
This is sad stuff.
"Well, what do you tell our teenagers?"
Tell them to wait. They won't die!
No one has ever died from the lack of ***!
And there's a lot of misinformation about that. People talk about this condition called "blueball"
and not trying to gross you up but...
Or I have the women: "But what about my son? Won't he get blueball if he don't mas..?"
No! They won't! That's one of the biggest urban myths that there are. It's the most ridiculous bunch of nonsense.
There is the condition like that but it has nothing to do with ***. Nothing! It has to do with being overstimulated for a long period of time.
And the answer is just quit being so stimulated, you get back to normal.
It's just not cronic condition, you're gonna walk around tortured for the rest of your life if you don't ***.
There's never been a morgue anywhere in the world where on the tomb it said:
"Cause of death: Failure to ***."
The biggest bunch of lies. We're not animals. Your kids are not animals.
You know what the difference between an animal and a human being is?
We can say "No"!
We have control over ourselves!
We live in a culture where the idea of having control over yourself is ludicrous! It's absurd!
There's people who'll hear this video, who'll go:
"Oh, I can't believe what he's sayin'! What false information! What false information!"
I speak of these things all around the country.
And every once a while I get into one of these scenarios where these "experts" are there.
And I tell them just what I think and it just freaks the *** out of them.
And they get: "What?..."
"Where's your proof? ... proof! "
Oh, I'll give you my proof!
You know, and they're so ignorant. Like we need to prove this?
We need to prove this? Some things are so obvious!
It's just like trying to prove: "Where is the proof that oxygen is good for your lungs?"
So I attempt to prove it to them.
Let's start with our scientific explanation, shall we?
Let's assume that "a" - a turned on woman
plus "b" - a turned on man
equals the best possible sex.
OK? Are you OK with it? You've followed? Did that seem logical?
For some reason this is like "wooow"!
"Oh, I've never heard such a thing!" To these "experts".
I mean, come on! If you don't have a turned on man, kinda hard to have really great sex!
If you don't have a turned on woman, kinda hard to have a really great sex!
So you can at least agree. You need a turned on woman
and a turned on man to have great sex! Yes? We we're there, OK?
Now let me take a little survey here.
About ***. Ladies...
If you... And you have to remember, these experts, these therapists,
these nitwits, I call, actually use this stuff in therapeutic ways.
It's prescriptive. *** is prescriptive. This will improve your sex lives.
So let me ask you, ladies, if you knew, your husband had just been watching ***
and wanted to use you to satisfy himself while thinking about that other woman,
how many of you would that make you feel very *** and turned on?
Let me see your hands.
OK.
We'll call that zero.
I presented this to some people, they said: "You can't do that!"
"You cannot ask women if they're turned on! That, that's... "
"They'll never raise their hands, and that will never work. It's improper!"
OK. Let me change the question.
If you knew your husband only thought about you
and treated you like the only woman in the world,
without thinking about any other women
how many that would make you feel *** or turned on? Let me see your hands!
Oh, so women will raise their hands!
Alright, alright! Come on!
I'd like to see your hands again, I gotta get to count. Hands!
OK, we'll call that lots.
Now for our formula for these "experts" who need proof, alright?
I have checked with some of the greatest mathematical minds in the country.
Some graduates of MIT, and have determined
after repeated and at length discussions
that lots is greater than zero.
It's brilliant, truly brilliant!
So we know now that *** results in a turned-off woman.
Well, right there, you've got yourself a problem.
If women are turned off by this idea of her husband fantasizing
then their prescription for *** to improve their sex lives is pure unadulterated baloney!
Because as soon as you remove... you can't get to the best possible sex!
Right?
And I have do this for thousands of people
I have yet to have a solitary woman who'd go: "Oh, yeah, that's great!"
And I'm sure there must be one or two out there.
But this is so lopsided it blows one's mind!
So blind are these people, that the Emperor is walking around naked! "...and all the experts say..."
Well, we know that repeat *** exposure
results in a diminished male. And I'm telling you,
these people are starting to notice this.
And we're getting writings of people and secular magazines, liberal magazines are complaining.
You know, hey! Men are not able to perform. This is impacting men physically, they're not able to perform,
as a result of this stuff.
I know of men, I know of ministers!
Who while they're making love to their wives
insist on having a dirty magazine open next to them so they can stay stimulated while making love to their wives.
You can imagine how wonderful that makes her feel.
Why do they have to do that? Because they cannot maintain an *** if they don't see that.
That is the addictive power of this thing.
And these people think this is good sex? This is great sex?
So we know that repeat *** exposure results in a diminished male.
Well, what's the scientific sign for a diminished male?
If this is the scientific sign for a normal male...
This would be the scientific sign...
for a diminished male. Alright? You're all checking with me here?
Alright, so this finally leads us to our scientific formula for the best possible sex.
If "a" - a turned on woman plus "b" - a turned on man
equals the best possible sex
and we know that *** results in a unturned on woman with repeated *** exposure resulting in a diminished man
then "a" plus "b" minus *** logically results in the best possible sex!
Which means that these "experts'" information has to be based on broken science.
(Broken science = BS = ***)
You can imagine, these people get really mad at me.
And I don't care!
I love it! I love it!
These people look at me like I've just dropped in from Mars!
This one lady who writes for, you know, a bunch of major women magazines in the country and newsweek magazines and stuff like that was interviewing me.
And she said: "Oh, I've never heard of such a thing. I mean, isn't *** normal? I mean..."
"After all, the children ***!"
So what? Children don't ***!
She says: "Well they touch themselves!"
So what, I touch myself!
And besides, is this our standard? Children?
I said: "My grandkids would eat their own poop if I let them."
"Does that mean we should all eat poop?"
I mean, just these people do not think! I'm telling you.
They're the most intelectually dishonest people in the world when it comes to this issue.
You know why? Because they're all addicted to this nonsense.
You know: "I need more ***! I need more ***! I need more fantasies!"
And then because of this imprinting that I talked about to you at the beginning.
These men are so imprinted, they've gotta consantly re-act and re-live pornographic or naughty scenarios in their minds
so they can enjoy sex.
If you've been there, I'm telling you. You need to break yourself of that!
You need to refocus. You need to take out the cameras and take some new pictures.
You make love to that girl "click! click! click!" Forget about that other stuff!
Quit tryin' to relive garbage in your head.
It won't give you great sex, it will rob you, I promise you
the key to great sex is focusing on just one woman.
You see, *** is like eating snack food all day long.
It will ruin your appetite for the real thing.
Your mama was right. Snacking will ruin your appetite.
You're out there checking out that babe, checking out that babe, checing out, checking out the magazine, checking out ***.
It's gonna rack your appetite for the real thing.
You just try it! Try it, for 30 days!
Anybody can do anything for 30 days!
For 30 days, do not look at another woman,
don't fantasize about another woman, don't look at some stupid magazine or ***.
You just focus on that girl and see what happens to you.
She will just come alive to you! And you to her.
She can sense when she is the only girl on the world to you.
It will rock! You'll have the best sex in your life! I promise to you, or your money back!
Let's get this right. I'm tellin' ya this will change your world.
It'll change your world. We've gotta start giving good information. Your kids need to hear about this.
They've been lied... When I do this for teenagers and for like young adults and college kids, they say they're stunned.
You know what they say to me afterwards? "How come no one ever told us this?"
All they've heard is the other nonsense.
"You mean I can never touch it?" I don't say you couldn't touch it, I've got a problem with couples touching each other and...
And people say: "What if we are gone for long periods of time?" OK, fine, fine, fine! It's not what I'm talking about!
I'm talking about you livin' in a house with a real woman and you ignore that woman
and make love to yourself.
This is insane.
It is not great sex, it is terrible sex.
These guys out there talk like, they act like: "We really know great sex... Hahahaa"
Such a nitwits!
Their No.1: fantasize, *** and then the No.3 they...
Wear a ***.
"Wear a ***!" That's our secular world's idea of great sex!
Man, to me wearing a *** is like
trying to eat an ice-cream cone with a sack on your tongue.
Man, if you wanna practice birth control, use something else than a ***, man!
If you can't tell a difference between real sex and a *** we need to have a telephone for you, man.
Raise money for our cure.
And, boy, that gets these "experts" really angry. When I say that get so angry.
"Oh, you're giving dangerous information! You're giving dangerous information!"
No, no, no! For the record! Camera 1, for the record, let me state:
"If you're going to have sex outside of marriage, by all means, wear a ***."
If I were you, I'd wear two or three.
Kind of like double bagging at the grocery store.
But do not delude yourself! Do not fool yourself.
That is not great sex. You want great sex? Get married!
The beautiful thing about being married is that I don't have to wear a stupid ***.
I know I'm freakin' some of you out, but I don't care.
I'm on a mission, man, let's get this stuff right! Let's get this stuff right, man.
God knew what He was talking about when He talked about one man focusing on just one woman.
This is great sex. That is incredible sex!
That'll blow your mind, knock your socks of sex!
This fantasy nonsense and all this other stuff is destructive, it is poisonous, it is not great sex
it robs these people of great sex
and they're constantly looking for better sex trying to get satisfied somehow, trying to up the level somehow. It's like a *** addict.
It doesn't work. It just doesn't work.
And if there's any group in the world who should have this together
it ought to be Christian people, in my opinion.
Christians are to be known for great sex.
We should! People ought to be sayin':
"Man, stupid Christians, I hate 'em." "Yeah, bunch of self-righteous hippocrates, you know."
"You know, they've got great sex lives though."
"Really?"
"What time these spousal services are?"
And we need to get this right.
I know it's hard. This whole *** thing can be a real struggle between men and women, that perfect stand off that we talked about.
But don't neglect this area. Pay attention to this area.
The Church is gettin' sucked in just like the rest of the world and it's sad.
Christian partnership and marriage magazines, whatever it's called, did the survey a year or two ago.
They asked this question: "How many times did you make love in the last week?"
You know what the No.1 answer was among people of faith?
Zero.
And we wonder why we're having the problems that we are having.
You know, men struggle with *** temptation like you have no idea.
And men cry out: "God, what's your answer for my sex drive? What's your answer?"
You know what God's answer for your sex drive is? "Have sex."
I like this answer!
Girls, you need to be there for him.
You have no idea how much men struggle with this.
You need to be there for him! Do not neglect your husband's *** needs!
I know, it's OK to put the conditions and all that kind of stuff and everything I talked about.
But bottom line, fundamentally, you cannot ignore this area.
I hear women complain bitterly: "Oh, I wish the men in our church were more involved."
"Oh, I wish the men in our church would get more exciting. And they just praise the Lord more."
I've got bad news for you girls: It's really hard for a sexually frustrated man
to praise the Lord.
You want your husband be praisin' the Lord by tomorrow morning? You put a smile on that boy's face tonight!
That's what I'm talking about!
He'll walk into this place going: "Hallelluia! Somebody sing a song! Oh, let's get going!"
Bingo!
Alright, do you all still love me? Alright!