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You wouldn't call me a liar if I said you was speedin'.
The baddest boss of all..
- Two years hard labor. - Hold on a second now.
...puts the Dukes on a chain gang.
I mean it!
- Gimme that. - Oop!
[screams]
I'll have some.
Ain't there nothin' we can do?
[all clamoring]
♪ Just the Good Ol' Boys ♪
♪ Never meanin' no harm ♪
♪ Beats all you never saw been in trouble with the law ♪
♪ Since the day they was born ♪
♪ Straightenin' the curves ♪
♪ Flattenin' the hills ♪
♪ Someday the mountain might get 'em ♪
♪ But the law never will ♪
♪ Makin' their way ♪
♪ The only way they know how ♪
♪ Well, that's just a little bit more ♪
♪ Than the law will allow ♪
♪ Just the Good Ol' Boys ♪
♪ Wouldn't change if they could ♪
♪ Fightin' the system like a true modern-day Robin Hood ♪♪
(both) 'Yee-haw!'
Now, we're goin' through a no man's land.
A road between Hazzard and Osage County.
Osage is so bad that they once plowed it under
and planted it in salt.
The folks there just love the improvement.
You sure you got them probation papers? Huh?
Yeah, they're signed by Boss. They're all legal-like.
We got permission to go into Osage County.
I wish they would've sent somebody else to go get 'em.
Only way the kids from orphanage are gonna get to Four-H camp
is if we go pick 'em up, right?
- Yeah. - Well, let's do it.
Yeah, I guess we can't let the kids down.
[instrumental music]
Oh, great.
There he is, old Droopy Cathcarte himself.
- I told ya I had a feeling. - Now, just be cool.
Don't give him any reason to arrest us.
Folks passing through Osage best keep on passin'
'cause it's patrolled by Sheriff R.P. Cathcarte.
Now, most folks call him Droopy
cause he resembles a bloodhound.
Now, a few years ago, Osage had a big prison reform.
They installed chain gangs.
This is Sheriff Cathcarte
calling Mr. Claibourne. Come back, sir.
Now, that there's
Colonel Cassius B. Claibourne himself.
The most feared county boss in all the South.
He runs Osage 'cause he owns it.
Now, he's lookin' to take Hazzard away from ol' Boss.
Droopy
you spot them Duke boys yet?
(Droopy) 'I'm on their tail.'
Good huntin'. Out.
Why the Duke boys?
They're the first step in my plan
to bring Boss Hogg to his knees.
I don't see how that's gonna smoke out Hogg. He hates them.
True, but Hazzard loves 'em, and public pressure's gonna
drive that porky little Hogg right into my net.
I been mapping this out for 11 months.
Sounds like we're gonna have a little fun here, don't it?
Great. He's pullin' us, Luke. I better just pull on over.
If we run, he's gonna arrest us for runnin'.
If we stop, he's gonna think up some excuse to arrest us anyway.
Listen, the only place we're safe is back in Hazzard.
- Let's get there. - You're right. Better hang on.
[siren blaring]
Bo, we got company.
Friends, by the way he's movin' and actin'
it ain't the first time he's done this.
Well, well, well, well.
[both chuckle]
Well, well.
Mornin', boys.
- Mornin'. - Mornin'.
What a nice day to be cruisin' our back roads, huh?
Yes, sir.
That's what we was doin', cruisin'.
Now, you wouldn't be calling me a liar
if I was to say you was speedin', now would you?
'That would be grounds for takin' you'
before Mr. Claibourne hisself, wouldn't you say?
[click]
Uh, I-I-I'd say so.
I suppose.
I thought so. Come on.
Uh, the-the car?
Leave it.
[car honks]
[instrumental music]
Now, y'all have heard of Southern hospitality.
Well, this ain't it.
- Come on. - Hey!
- You don't have to shove. - You shut up now.
- Bo. - Get on in there.
Mr. Claibourne wants to see you personally.
Go on.
Well, as I live and breathe.
The famous Duke boys.
You ain't got no call to have us cuffed, do ya?
We ain't?
Why, son, you just broke every vehicular law in our books.
Speedin', reckless drivin'
resistin' arrest, evadin' an officer
'destruction of county property.'
Back in Hazzard that'd add up to 20 bucks.
Now, we'll just pay you the money.
I don't want your money, boys.
And you ain't in Hazzard.
[banging the cane]
I hereby sentence you to two years' hard labor
on the Osage road gang.
- Two years? - Hold on a second now.
- Step right on back. - Take 'em away, Slater.
Boys..
...have a nice day.
[Droopy chuckling]
[door slams]
Tell Slater to keep a short rein on 'em.
I don't want 'em runnin' out before I run Hogg in.
- Droopy? - Yes, sir?
Take a look at what I'm about to acquire.
The J.D. Hogg Still, The Hogg Mortuary
The Boars Nest, The theater.
It's gonna be such a pleasure
takin' my ol' enemy apart piece by little piece.
So Claibourne put his plan into motion
by callin' the Hazzard radio station, WHOGG.
This bein' Hazzard, it wasn't long before the whole town
knew what happened to Bo and Luke Duke.
Isn't that good news?
You mean that my sworn enemy, Cassius Claibourne
he-he's got his hands on the Duke boys?
- That's it. - Oh, glory be.
Them Duke boys are gonna be out of my hair for two years?
Hallelujah!
And just to celebrate, I just wonder
could I've a little piece of this pizza?
[Hogg screaming]
[screams]
Oh, oh, oh! Little fat muffin, you alright?
- Oh, I bet that was horrendous. - Don't you worry, Rosco.
- I ain't mad at you. - You ain't?
No, no. I'm so thrilled about 'em Duke boys being locked up
that I couldn't care at all
about a little thing like a broken skull.
You boys better get the rules straight.
Listen to me when I'm talkin' to you.
You refer to me as "sir." Same goes for the other guards.
Got it?
Just like in the Marines, Slater. Sir.
Watch your mouth, Duke.
We got ways of correcting bad attitudes.
(Bo) 'Just how do you go about doing that...sir?'
Some time in solitary.
Or a few rounds with me and my boys.
It don't usually last too long.
- I can hardly wait for that. - 'You got somethin' to say?'
Oh, no, see, I was just wondering if we could leave.
- Sir. - Let me tell you somethin'.
In 20-odd years I been here
ain't no prisoner ever left this road gang of his own free will.
Alive.
Of course, I can't take all the credit.
Some goes to my two hounds over there.
Come here, boys.
That's right. Get to know these two.
They're gonna be with us a long, long time.
Enos took it on himself to break the awful news
to Uncle Jesse and Daisy.
It was just about the hardest thing he had ever had to do.
Enos. Well, I thought I heard somethin'.
Uncle Jesse, look who's here.
- Hi. How you doing? - Hi, Daisy.
- Not too good, thanks. - Why? What's wrong?
- Hey, Enos. - Hey, Uncle Jesse.
Can you stay for dinner?
No, sir, Uncle Jesse, I, I got bad news.
Bo and Luke's been taken in Osage and put on the road gang.
It's all over town.
The Osage road gang? What for?
Must be some kind of mistake, Daisy.
No, it's no mistake.
I know that Cassius Claibourne and he don't make no mistakes.
Well, what does he got against Bo and Luke?
Well, I don't know.
I mean, he's always kinda butted heads with J.D. Hogg
but...Bo and Luke?
(Daisy) 'What are we gonna do, Uncle Jesse?'
Well, I'm gonna go over there and..
...try to talk some sense into that Cassius Claibourne.
You ain't goin' without me.
Thanks, Enos.
[softly] Daisy.
Y'all need me, now, you know where to find me.
- Say hello to Bo and Luke. - I'll check with you.
Takin' it off here, sir.
Takin' it off.
Looks like a good idea.
Yeah, takin' it off here, sir.
- Takin' it off. - Takin' it off here, sir.
'Takin' it off.'
Well, it's been fun, but I think it's time to move on.
These guards around here don't look too bright except Slater.
Been watchin' him pretty close.
He leaves the keys in his car.
You, uh, reckon we oughta try?
I think we oughta think about it a little more first.
Get a plan together. We can take off tomorrow.
Alright.
Back at it. Back to work.
Knowin' Jesse like he did
Claibourne was expectin' his visit
and when the Dukes came to Osage he was ready for it.
Bo and Luke didn't do anything.
They were just pickin' up orphans like they do every year.
They did not do one thing wrong.
"Didn't do one thing wrong."
Well, as I live and breathe
them boys have shown the most reckless disregard for the law.
Oh, now, come on, Cassius.
We've known each other too long.
Now, tell me, what's the real reason
you want them boys on the chain gang?
I just told you.
Alright.
Alright, I'm gonna demand a trial.
They were given due process accordin' to the laws
of Osage County.
Now, get outta here, Jesse.
I got more important business to take care of.
Cassius, what you're doin' is illegal, unconstitutional
and un-American.
We got a thing in this country called justice
and I'm gonna see that some of it comes here to Osage County!
It's like talkin' to a ding-dang owl.
You see, Claibourne knew everybody would blame Boss
for not extraditing Bo and Luke
since ol' Boss was their probation officer.
And he figured right.
Everybody in Hazzard was ugly mad.
They was threatenin' to boycott the Boars Nest
have a run on his bank
and not re-elect his stooge, Rosco.
And if they could've kept his chickens from layin'
they'd have done that too.
The answer is no.
Hello?
- Hello? - Hello?
Hello?
It's this one.
Yeah? Look, the answer is no.
Them Duke boys can rot in..
Oh, well, well, well, well, well.
[laughs]
If it ain't my public enemy number one
the double-crossin' Colonel Cassius Claibourne.
'Alright, what do you want?'
Well, I thought you might like to talk
about a little deal for the Duke boys.
Oh, well, that ain't none of my business.
Yeah.
Well, suppose I make it your business.
What say we trade your prime shine contracts
for the safe return of the Duke boys?
What? My shine contracts?
Listen, I wouldn't trade the hair off a pig's back
for them Duke boys. You hear me? Goodbye.
Oh!
Over in Osage, Jesse and Daisy was fixin' to leave
when Bo and Luke returned
from their first day on the road gang.
(Daisy) 'Luke! Bo! Hey.'
(Jesse) 'Hey, how y'all doin'?'
(Bo) Daisy, you sure are a sight for sore eyes.
- So are you. - Boys.
Shut up, you Dukes. Get back. This ain't visitin' day.
Get those two outside and lock the gate.
Hey, you back off.
I just was sayin' hello to my cousins.
We're gonna get you outta here. Leave me alone.
- I mean it! - Daisy, come on. Come on now.
(Jesse) We'll come back another time. It's alright.
We'll get you outta here some way, boys.
You'll be out before you know it.
You boys bring your cousin here on Sunday
and I'll give her a little roughhousin'.
Slater, you said somethin' about goin' a few rounds.
- How 'bout now? - You bet.
Now, I'm gonna show you boys a little somethin' about attitude.
Now, y'all may know that social intercourse
in Osage is somewhat lackin' in grace.
[all clamoring]
I said not to mess with us. Get up.
[gunshot]
That's enough, Slater. Fight's over.
I ain't finished yet.
From the looks of things, I'd say you were.
Now, get your shotgun before you have a riot on your hands.
Yes, sir.
We'll finish this later.
What are you *** grinnin' at?
Go on, get on back to the barracks right now.
Alright.
[laughter]
- All mouth, no punch. - Yeah, you got that right.
Wasn't the smartest thing we've ever done.
No, but he just fell right down.
Hey, don't go congratulatin' yourselves too much.
Slater's really gonna come down on you now.
[laughing]
But, man, that was great while it lasted.
[laughter]
Thanks, Charlie.
Hey, listen, Don't you worry about us none either.
We got relatives, gonna get us outta here.
We ain't done nothin' wrong.
Well, everybody here is here under false charges
and not likely to get out neither.
Come on, Charlie, Claibourne can't keep you in here forever.
He can and he does.
Every time one of us comes up for parole
he thinks of some new excuse to tack on more time.
I been here six years.
Well, shoot, Charlie, what'd you do?
Jaywalkin'.
You're kiddin'.
I think me and Bo are gonna cut our stay a little short.
Oh.
You two got an escape plan?
No, but, well, shoot, we oughta be able to think of somethin'.
Yeah. Well, you only get one chance.
Why is that?
'Cause the second time, you don't come back...alive.
[instrumental music]
Though all of Hazzard was rallyin' to the Dukes' side
Boss wasn't givin' in.
Things were so bad for Bo and Luke
that Daisy and Jesse had to come to make a personal plea.
And that took swallowin' years of pride.
Boss? Alright, Boss.
Oh, oh. This is the last straw. What do you Dukes want?
You know exactly what we want.
We want you to do something about Bo and Luke.
Listen J.D, we've known each other since we were kids
and I've never asked you for one thing
so you know how important this is to me.
We've gotta do somethin' about them boys.
It ain't that I don't wanna help you Jesse.
- It's just that I can't. - He can't.
You see, Cassius Claibourne is a sworn enemy of mine.
I-I ain't even talked to him in years.
That's a little white lie.
Remember, you talked to him just a little while ago?
- He told you to make a deal-- - Would you please..
- A deal? - Wait a minute.
You made a deal with Claibourne for Bo and Luke?
No, no, no, no deal.
Never no deal. It was more like a trade.
- What kind of a trade? - A what?
- Well, um, uh.. - More of a swap.
J.D.!
[screams]
Sugar lumps, what are you doin' here?
- You're not at the fat farm? - I cut my visit short.
Yeah, well-well-well, how did you do up there anyhow?
Well, I only gained 6 pounds.
- 'Only 6 pounds?' - 'Oh, goody, goody gumdrops.'
That's better than last time. You gained 10.
- And then she bribed the guard. - Huh?
I came when I heard about Bo and Luke.
Now, now, now, angel food--
Don't you angel food me, Jefferson Davis Hogg.
You know I love those boys.
Now, you gotta get them back or else.
Or else what?
Or else no more cookin', no more cleanin'
and no more separate refrigerators.
Gak, gak, gak.
Alright, Rosco..
Where the townspeople and the Dukes had failed
Lulu prevailed.
Boss knuckled under and agreed to meet Claibourne
at the county line and give up his shine contracts.
(Hogg) This is the worst day of my life.
I'm gonna have to pay to get them Duke boys back
from Cassius Claibourne.
(Rosco) I know it. You know, he's got that lean, mean look.
- So I don't trust him one bit. - Oh, yeah?
Only people I trust are fat, roly-poly buddies like you.
Get your hands off of me.
If it hadn't been for you and your sister in the first place..
Your wife.
...I wouldn't be here with these contracts in the second place.
- Good grief. - Come on, come on, let's go.
- Well, well, well and well, - Yeah.
Look at that. There's the General Lee.
'There's the Duke boys, alright. They don't look so good.'
Well, let's go over there--
- What, what? - What are you doin'?
- What? - Don't step over that line.
- Oh, good grief. - Oh, for goodness' sakes.
- Do you think it's a trap? - I don't know what it is.
I ain't gonna take a step in Osage County
- I know that. - Me neither.
I mean, after all..
'...I don't see Cassius Claibourne no place.'
- You know I was just thinkin'. - What?
If I was to tippytoe over there and get those Dukes, then you..
Wouldn't have to give up these here shine contracts, would I?
[chuckling]
No, no, no.
- I don't know about it, though. - What?
Well, we'd have to go awful quick.
Well, listen, we could do that
because there ain't nobody within a quarter of a mile
because I got eyes like a hawk.
- You do, huh? - Yeah. Police trainin'.
- Yeah. Whatever you say. - Yeah.
Alright, I'm willin' to take a chance.
- An itty-bitty little one. - Little bitty.
Get ready, Droopy.
- Come on. Come on. - Come on, Bo, come on.
I'll help you out.
- Oh. - Oh.
Hit 'em, Droopy.
[siren blaring]
- It's a dummy. - Yeah and so are we.
Come on, we gotta run.
Arrest Hogg for loitering and trespassing.
[both giggling]
Hello, Cassius.
Mr. Claibourne to you, Hogg.
Mr. Claibourne. Oh, say, here. Lookie here.
These are the shine contracts.
Now, then, if you'll just release the real Duke boys
like you promised, the sheriff and I will be on our way.
You're already on your way, J.D
to the Osage road gang.
Uh, road gang?
Oh! Road gang? Well, t-take tubby here.
He needs the exercise. I'll just..
Oh, listen, do you know to whom you're pointing that?
Listen, it so happens that I am Rosco P. Coltrane.
I'm the sheriff and you can't arrest me.
I know.
We're arrestin' you for impersonatin'
an officer of the law.
This is our county. We can do whatever we like.
- Come on. - Yeah, but...it was your fault.
Well, it looks like old Claibourne's fixin'
to gobble up Hazzard like a country Pacman.
While back at the prison, Duke luck was holdin' firm.
You guys got your plan worked out, huh?
Yeah, just about.
We're gonna need you and your guys to create a diversion.
And why should we help you?
As soon as we're out, we're gonna come and pick y'all up.
That's why.
- We'll do what we can. - Alright.
(Bo) 'Lasagna. Thank you.'
- Just in time for...Ow! - Argh! Would you stop it.
(Hogg) 'Stop pullin' on me. You're draggin' off my ankle bone.'
Them voices sound familiar.
- Get on out there. - Stop.
Faces look familiar too. I just can't place the uniform.
Boss, you want a hand with that anchor?
Huh? Oh, you stay away from me, Luke Duke.
Rosco and me wouldn't be here, in the first place
except on account of you two miserable troublemakers.
- 'Yeah.' - Suit yourself.
- 'You smell that?' - What?
- Food. Food. - Beans.
- Give me that. Give me some. - Oh, look at those.
(Rosco) Look at those little beans, just hoppin' for joy in that..
Mr. Claibourne's orders. You're goin' on a diet.
A diet? Oh, no, he can't do that to me.
- Rosco, give me your plate. - No.
- Come on, give me that. - These are mine.
Oop!
(guard #1) 'Come on, you dodo..'
You know, that ball and chain might come in handy.
(Hogg) 'Rosco, come on.'
Back in Hazzard, news of Boss and Rosco's arrest
spread like wildfire.
Jesse and Daisy hightailed it over to Lulu's house.
They knew that she'd need company.
Listen, I'm tryin' to be brave, honest I am
but every time I, I think of my poor Jefferson
and my little baby brother
witherin' away on a chain gang I just come apart.
[Lulu sobbing]
'They're not used to laboring, you know.'
Neither one of 'em has ever done a day's work in their lives.
Now, Lulu, you can't be imaginin' the worst.
Bo and Luke are there to help 'em.
Daisy, I just feel so helpless.
Jesse, ain't there nothin' we can do?
Uh, oh, well, yeah, uh
uh, I've got a call in to Congressman Ezra Fulton.
I've known him since he was a kid.
I-I don't like bringin' strangers into family business
but this is gettin' to be more than we can handle.
- Uh, do you mind? - No.
Uh, hello, Gussie? This is Jesse Duke.
I'm over at J.D. Hogg's place.
Listen, would you try to get that Ezra Fulton
'for me again in Washington, D.C.?'
Well, Jesse finally reached the congressman this time
and he told him to get down to Capitol City
and pick up a release order from the federal judge.
And that's where they're headed.
Meanwhile, back on the Osage road gang
Luke had figured out a way to use Boss and Rosco's
ball and chain in his escape plan.
Boss.
- Oh, that's good. - Hey, wait a minute.
Oh, this slop, it ain't fit for pigs.
Oh, well, listen, uh, there's a little boll weevil in mine.
- He's havin' a good time. - Look at that.
- That's terrible. - Look at that.
- Oh, watch it. - Oh, I'm sorry.
(Hogg) 'Did that hurt?'
What's goin' on here?
[instrumental music]
Get there. Get over here with those.
[instrumental music]
(guard #2) Get back. Get back here.
[prisoners cheering]
Droopy, come in..
While Slater was radioing Droopy Cathcarte for help
Jesse and Daisy was headin' toward Osage
with the release order.
Let me see it just once more.
There it is.
Thank goodness.
He ain't never gonna catch us in that old thing.
Yeah, but look up there.
Oh, terrific.
[siren blaring]
[music continues]
Luke, he's gainin' on us.
This thing ain't runnin' worth anythin'.
Come on, car.
Alright, get ready to jump.
- Jump? - Ready?
- Alright. - Two, three.
[music continues]
[hounds barking]
Come on, boy. Let's find those Dukes.
Them dogs is useless.
[sniffing]
They went that way.
Jesse and Daisy got to the prison in record time.
So fast in fact that they got there ahead of the news
that Bo and Luke had escaped.
We got here a court order for the release of Bo, Luke
J.D. and Rosco.
Too bad you done this.
As you know, I ain't somebody you wanna rile up.
We ain't afraid of you, Mr. Claibourne.
You just let our guys go, like the order says.
(Droopy on radio) 'Mr. Claibourne, Droopy here. I got a 10-34, come back.'
Claibourne. What's wrong?
We got a prison break. Uh, them Duke boys.
'I'm on their tail.'
(Claibourne) 'What about Hogg and his dippy sheriff?'
Secure.
They was aidin' and abettin', though.
Go get 'em.
Now, ain't that a pity.
This here order ain't worth the paper it's written on.
Uh, but you..
'Especially when we got escaped convicts.'
You gonna be lucky if my deputies
don't shoot your nephews on sight, Jesse Duke.
[intense music]
Why do you suppose they call them bloodhounds?
I ain't lookin' to find out.
- They are persistent, though. - Yeah.
Did you bring the pepper?
I thought you were gonna bring the pepper.
You are a big help.
Look, you said you was gonna bring the pepper.
(Luke) 'You know, they say bloodhounds can't track through water.'
- Come on. - Water?
[hounds barking]
I'm gonna enjoy watchin' them dogs flappin'
around the water wonderin' where we are.
(Luke) 'There they are.'
(guard #3) Get in. Come on.
They're going.
Alright.
- It worked. - Yeah, like a charm.
- Good work. - Let's head towards home.
Looks like this is one bloodhound they didn't fool.
Did you have a nice swim?
Yes, sir.
Come on.
What we got here..
...is a failure to demonstrate
a good attitude.
Now, you two boys made a bad mistake
tryin' to run out on me.
The only mistake we made was gettin' caught.
And we don't intend on makin' that one again.
Is that so?
Maybe a little time in solitary
would help you see the error of your ways.
'No food for 24 hours. Lock 'em up.'
My pleasure, Mr. Claibourne.
Make sure, you get the one with the view.
- See you in the mornin'. - I'm goin', Slater.
During the time the boys was in solitary
Boss got fed up with his three-bean treatment
and demanded to see Claibourne
which was just what old Cassius was awaitin' for.
I mean, my death is gonna be on your hands, you hear that?
I'm weak from hunger. Those three-bean meals.
Oh, I feel like I ought to just curl up right here.
(Rosco) 'You see? He's got a vapor lock from hunger.'
'Me too.'
Ooh. Ooh, gee, Boss..
[Hogg sniffing]
Oh, ho ho ho. Look, look, look.
- I'm saved. - He's saved.
Oh, thank you, thank you. I'll have some.
- J.D. - What? What?
Would you take them tender, juicy barbecued ribs?
I will, I will!
In trade for your used-car dealership?
[gasps] My used-car dealership?
For ribs?
Well, maybe. Yeah, I'll trade.
- Where do I sign? - Where does he sign?
- Yeah. - Right there.
Oh, right. "J.D. Hogg."
- Oh, ribs, ribs. - I'm gonna be his cosigner.
Give me some of them.
J.D..
...since you seem to be enjoyin'
them tender, juicy barbecued ribs so much
maybe you'd like to try
some of my succulent Southern fried chicken?
(Hogg) 'Oh, is there chicken too?'
Cooked the way you like it.
- Greasy. - Oh, chicken.
- No, no. - In trade..
In trade for the Boars Nest.
Oh, my Boars Nest for chicken?
Yeah, I'll trade. Where-where do I sign?
Right here.
Listen. Uh, listen, sir, I have $43.13 in my savings account.
Now, you can have all of that for one little piece of..
J.D..
...I think since you've enjoyed this marvelous meal so much
that you ought to top it off
with one of my delicious, moist
chocolate layer cakes.
Oh, cake? Is there cake for dessert?
- It's my favorite. - I'll have some.
Bring it on, bring it on.
(Claibourne) 'In trade for the Hazzard Bank.'
Hazzard Bank?
'Not on your life.'
Uh..
But...for cake.
Yeah, yeah, I'll trade. Where do I sign?
"J.D. Hogg." Now, give me the cake.
[intense music]
Next mornin', the boys crawled out of solitary
all bright eyed and bushy tailed.
That wasn't so bad.
No.
No, it wasn't.
Howdy.
(Bo) Morning, gentlemen.
- The response is deafenin'. - Somethin' we said?
Uh, don't mind them. Just a little upset.
When you guys didn't make it, they felt let down.
You know, they, they pinned their hopes on you guys.
Look, just 'cause we didn't make it
don't mean we ain't gonna try it again.
Uh, nobody ever comes out of even one day of solitary
quite the way they went in.
Well, you got that right, Charlie.
It did give us a whole bunch of time to think of another plan.
Mmm-hm.
[Hogg moaning]
(Bo) What's that?
- Excuse me, Charlie. - Boss?
Hey, Rosco. What's the matter with Boss?
Well, it's called gluttonousness, greediness.
He nearly ate himself to death.
Oh, my stomach. I'm dyin'.
'I'll trade my beautiful white convertible car'
for bicarbonate of soda.
You ain't got no white convertible car no more.
You traded it for that anchovy and pepperoni garlic pizza.
I know.
Rosco, what have you two been up to?
Well, it ain't me. It's old Greed Gut here.
He traded half of Hazzard County for just one meal.
Oh, that's crazy.
Yeah, but it was a delicious meal. Ow!
Well, I can only take your word for that, can't I?
Because I didn't get one little eeny-teeny bite.
Don't worry, y'all. We'll feel better once we get outta here.
Well, folks, "Sunday come-a-visiting day"
finally did come.
And Uncle Jesse, Daisy and Lulu were first through the gates
with a cornucopia of country cookin'.
(Jesse) Guess we can't touch each other.
I can give you a kiss.
Are you alright?
We're sorry, Uncle Jesse, Daisy.
Sorry? Not half as sorry as we are.
You know, we came here with the papers for your release
'and then found out you'd escaped?'
- You had a court order? - 'That's right.'
Dang it, we had no way of knowin'.
Listen, ya'll, it's nobody's fault.
We'll just have to think of somethin' else.
Daisy's right. We gotta think positive.
But no more escapin'.
'I'd rather have you in here alive'
than along the road out there somewhere dead.
Uncle Jesse, you see that fellow over there?
Well, he's been in here for six years for jaywalkin'.
Claibourne ain't ever gonna let us out.
Hey, Bo, it just occurred to me, but what did Rosco just tell us?
Well, that Boss Hogg gave up half his holdings
to Claibourne to feed his face.
Claibourne just got us here to use us as bait to get to Boss.
'And now that we've messed up that escape attempt'
he got no reason to let us go.
The only way we're gonna get out is to bust this place wide open.
Well, uh, better look like you're eatin'.
They're beginnin' to watch us.
What have you got in mind?
Y'all think you can break the General Lee
out of the impound yard?
You got it.
I declare, Jefferson, you look like you've put on
about 10 pounds since you got here.
Well, that's just about half of it.
- Here, listen, I want a half-- - Would you hush up, please?
It's my stomach. I say, I'm feelin' poorly.
Uh, you didn't bring any bicarbonate of soda, did you?
- Listen, I just can't wait. - 'Not that one, Rosco.'
I just can't..
Whoa.
(Rosco) 'Whoa.'
- Alright, don't anybody move. - Why, that's a..
Lady, that's the dumbest thing I ever saw. Put 'em in solitary.
- Not me. - No, listen..
I didn't have nothin' to do with it.
- I'm innocent. - I'm with him.
(Rosco) I don't wanna go in there.
Alright, visitin' day's over. Everybody inside.
This is gonna change our plans some.
Yeah.
(Jesse) Y'all gonna be alright. You got it?
- Yeah, see you later. - Wanna take some chicken?
(Bo) No, we better not.
- I didn't bring that stuff. - Got room service in here?
You couldn't bring me a bicarb, could ya?
- There it is. - There's the car.'
And so next day, Jesse and Lulu
started on the first steps of Luke's plan.
Robert, we wanna talk to you a minute.
And sweet Daisy was set to do her part
liberatin' the General.
[indistinct chattering]
[instrumental music]
You don't have my car here?
(Robert) 'No, I've it here, but Mr. Claibourne'
'won't let you have that car.'
(Jesse) 'Well, now, we need a whole lot of--'
[engine starts]
Now, if I was anybody standin' around
I wouldn't wanna be standin' in front of Daisy
long about now.
[engine revving]
Woo!
At the prison, Bo and Luke got set for the big breakout.
While Daisy was keepin' on, keepin' on.
- You see her? - 'Yeah.'
Hi, there.
Hi, there yourself, miss. Can we help you?
I certainly hope so.
- See, I love men in uniform. - Is that right?
Mm-hm. My only problem is you're both so adorable
I can't make up my mind between the two of you.
- Ha. Come on. - It's true.
Listen, I'll tell you what.
Why don't I read your palm?
It tells a lot about a man, you know.
You just set those nasty shotguns down
and put your arms through here.
Oh, this will be fun.
That's it, give me your hands.
(Bo) Alright, she's all set. Let her rip, boys.
Don't worry, fellas. You both have very long lifelines.
Alright, what do you think you're doin' here?
Give me them keys, pal.
- Take him down. - Get him.
Are we ready, let's go.
'Let's go. Go, go, go.'
Let's go. Go.
Alright, get in the truck, in the truck.
Get you outta there in a second, Boss.
Alright, Bo, let's go.
(Boss) Bo! Never figured I'd be so glad to see somebody like you!
Slater! Get us loose here, Slater!
Get us outta here!
We got cuffs on. Get us out of here.
'Slater. Come on, will you?'
'Slater! Get us outta here.'
[vehicle honking]
(Boss) 'What are they stoppin' for?'
'We ain't safe until we're over the line in Hazzard County.'
- Hey. - Boy, am I glad to see you.
Uncle Jesse's waitin' at county line.
Let's go.
I wonder if we got time to stop for a corn dog.
Oh, would you hush up?
We'll see you in Hazzard, Bo.
Yeah, 10-4.
[instrumental music]
(Bo) 'Oh, great.'
Hey, Luke, guess what. We got us some company.
(Bo) 'This old truck's givin' me all she's got.'
I know. Just keep her steady I'll try and hold him off.
Well, don't you just know Slater CB'd old Droopy
and the colonel to come help.
If the Hazzard folks get back over the line
it could be real serious for Colonel Claibourne.
It didn't take old Droopy long to catch up with the caravan.
I hope the Dukes got a plan for this turn of events.
(Bo) 'Droopy's comin'.'
I see him. It's time to split up.
That's a big 10-4. I'll stick to the road.
- Where we goin'? - The scenic route. Hang on.
Guys, you better give 'em all you got.
'I can't hold 'em off anymore.'
Them boys tryin' to hurt us bad, Droopy.
Don't worry about it, Mr. Claibourne. We'll get them.
Well, they should be along here pretty directly.
Oh, Jesse. Lord have mercy. I hope they're alright.
Oh, they'll be fine.
Listen, you don't come out of one of those places
without a few bruises.
I'm just worried sick.
Quit worrying, they'll be..
Now you got me worried.
- They gonna get away! - No, they ain't.
Looks like the old bloodhound got snared in his own trap.
Lulu! Lulu!
[instrumental music]
Hurry, hurry. Come on, come on.
- Welcome to Hazzard County. - You're on our side now.
- Here you go. - Thank you.
Now, J.D.--
Listen, you call me Mr. Hogg, you hear?
- Yes, sir, Mr. Hogg. - That's better.
You can't arrest me. I'm an officer of the law.
Oh, tish-tosh, tilly-walker, I can do anything I want.
See, this is my county now.
And while you're at it, give them Dukes a ticket
for disturbin' the peace speedin', through Hazzard County
and everything else you can think of.
Boy, things don't change much around here, do they?
Things got back to normal in Hazzard in short order.
Boss got all of his businesses back and he was lookin' forward
to some of Lulu's fine home cooking.
Yeah, I can't wait.
But Lulu figured that it was time
that old Boss lost some weight that he'd gained in prison.
On account of the Dukes, an investigation
freed all the prisoners who were in on false charges.
Now, that closed the Osage road prison forever.
It was renovated and reopened as an orphan's farm camp.
You see, folks around Hazzard
don't like to see nothin' go to waste.
[theme music]