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>>> TONIGHT ON "RED EYE."
>> COMING UP ON "RED EYE" HAVE
SCIENTISTS INVENTED A CORN DOG
THAT WILL HELP PREDICT THE
MARCH MADNESS TOURNAMENT?
THE STORY THE NCAA DOES
PRESIDENT WANT YOU TO HEAR.
AND IS OBAMACARE A GIANT STEP
TOWARD SOCIALISM?
>> NOT A GIANT STEP, BUT A
LARGE STEP.
>> WHAT DOES JUSTIN BIEBER
LIKE TO DO WHEN NOT MAKING HIT
RECORDS?
WE HUNG OUT WITH THE POP STORE
AT HIS L.A -- THE POP STAR AT
HIS L.A. MANSION.
NONE OF THESE STORIES ON "RED
EYE" TONIGHT JIE. SHE'S IS HOT
THAT OLD MEN POUR WATER ON HER
IN THE SAUNA.
I AM HERE WITH AUTHOR,
COLUMNIST, JEDEDIAH BILA.
AND SHE WILL ONLY GO OUT WITH
YOU FOR THE FREE DRINKS AND
THEN SHE WILL GO BACK TO TRIM
HER TAIL.
IT IS JOANNE.
AND HE -- IT IS TV'S ANDY
LEVY.
AND IF HILARITY WAS A STICKY
WOULD BE STICKY.
A FIRST-TIME GUEST, "SATURDAY
NIGHT LIVE" WRITER MICHAEL
CHAY.
HE GOES BY CHAY.
>> A BLOCK.
THE LEDE THAT'S THE FIRST
STORY.
>> IS THAT TRUE GREG?
>> VERY OLD JOKE.
>> IS MILEY'S DAD JUST AS
BAD?
DID HE OUT JERK THE TWERK?
IT IS DAY 97 OF -- THEY DID A
REMAKEY OF ACHY BREAKY.
BILLY RAY CYRUS HAD AN UPDATE
TO HIS SONG WITH THE HELP OF A
RAPPER.
IT IS A SCI-FI EPIC FEATURING
LL MY HEART.
♪
♪ MY ACHY BREAKY HEART ♪
>> I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT TO
SAY.
I WILL GO TO YOU, CHEY.
THE THING THAT CREEPS ME OUT
IS HE IS REFERENCING THESE
WOMEN AND AT THE SAME TIME
REFERENCING HIS DAUGHTER.
>> HIS DAUGHTER ISN'T EVEN IN
THE VIDEO.
IF YOU CAN'T GET YOUR DAUGHTER
IN THE INDIVIDUAL.
>>, MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T --
NOTICE VIDEO, MAYBE YOU
SHOULDN'T BE IN TALKING ABOUT
HER IN THE VIDEO.
IT IS SAD.
IT IS REALLY SAD.
THAT VIDEO IS NEW FROM LIKE 10
YEARS AGO.
WHO PRODUCED IT?
>> IT IS REALLY IMPRESSIVE.
JEDEDIAH, WHY NOT?
>> I LIKE IT.
I LIKE IT.
I AM ALREADY SINGING TO IT AND
DOWNLOADING IT WHEN I GET
HOME.
I FEEL LIKE HE SHOULD HAVE PUT
LARRY KING IN IT.
LARRY KING IS FULL OF
AWESOME.
HE SHOULD HAVE INTERSPERSED
HIM THROUGHOUT THE VIDEO.
I DON'T LIKE THE OUTFITS
THOUGH I HAVE TO SAY.
I AM NOT A BIG FAN OF THE
OUTFITS.
HE STEPPED OUTSIDE OF THE
BOX.
>> THAT'S LIKE THE OLDEST
RAPPER IN THE WORLD TO BE ON
IT THAT IS NOT FAMOUS.
>> THERE ARE HOT GIRLS
TWEROU WANT?
>> WE WANT MUTE.
>> I THINK HE IS DIONNE
WARWICK'S SON.
COULDN'T HER PSYCHIC FRIENDS
TELL HIM NOT TO DO THIS?
>> SHE IS 89 SO HE HAS TO BE
54.
>> HE IS A GRAND PARENT.
>> THEY ARE TRYING TO BRIDGE
THE GAP BETWEEN COUNTRY AND
R&B.
>> AND THERE IS NO BRIDGE
THERE.
>> IT IS UNITING THE COUNTRY.
>> I WANT TO ASK THAT YOU ARE
A DAUGHTER OF SOMEBODY AND
PERHAPS A FATHER.
DO YOU SEE THIS AS A WAY OF
SHARING A HOBBY?
THIS IS THE WAY TO --
>> NO, HE IS CALLING OUT TO
HER.
THIS IS HIS WAY OF HOLDING AN
INTERVENTION, HIS ACHY BREAKY
HEART IS BREAKING.
HIS DAUGHTER IS TWERKING AND
DOING ALL OF THESE LUDICROUS
THINGS.
WITH LUDICROUS IT COULDN'T
HAVE BEEN MUCH BETTER.
HE IS SHOWING HER THE ROAD SHE
IS HEADED DOWN.
>> BECAUSE HE HAS BEEN SUCH A
GOOD FATHER THROUGHOUT HIS
LIFE AND CLEARLY THAT'S WHAT
HE IS DOING.
>> HE HAS BEEN A GOOD DAD.
>> HAS HE?
>> SHE IS DOING ALL RIGHT FOR
HERSELF.
I WISH I HAD A MILELY.
A MILEY.
SHE DOES PRESIDENT WEAR -- SHE
DOESN'T WEAR A LOT OF CLOTHES,
BUT ISN'T THAT WHAT IT IS
ABOUT?
>> HAPPY AND NUDE AND YOUR
TONGUE OUTSIDE YOUR MOUTH.
>> THAT'S HOW YOU CAN TELL IF
A DOG IS HAPPY.
>> THAT'S TRUE.
THAT'S TRUE.
AND SHE WAGS HER TAIL.
>> SHE WAGS HER TAIL AND
STICKS HER TONGUE OUT.
IT IS A HAPPY LADY.
>>Y POINT AND MAYBE IT IS
RIDICULOUS, BUT JUSTIN BIEBER
WAS ARRESTED WITH HIS FATHER
DRAG RACING.
DOES BILLY RAY THINK MAYBE
THIS IS THE WAY YOU BOND?
>> YOU ARE GIVING HIM WAY TOO
MUCH CREDIT.
BILLY RAY THINKS THIS IS THE
WAY YOU MAKE MONEY WHICH GETS
TO THE PPOIMT OF HOW STUPID HE
IS.
LARRY KING SAYS I APOLOGIZE
FOR BRINGING YOU THE STARTLING
INFORMATION.
HE SHOULD HAVE STOPPED AFTER I
APOLOGIZE.
AN UNIDENTIFIED FLYING OBJECT
TRAN SEND -- TRAN SENDING OVER
EUROPE.
ANYBODY THAT KNOWS ANYTHING
MEANS THAT DOES PRESIDENT MEAN
ANYTHING.
DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING.
IS IT TRAVELING 35,000 MILES
OVER EUROPE OR OVER EASTERN
KENTUCKY.
I AM CONFUSED AT THIS POINT.
THE WHOLE VIDEO MADE NO
SENSE.
>> AND BILLY RAY WIELDING A
GUITAR, BUT YOU DON'T HEAR
GUITAR.
>> YOU CAN HEAR SOME GUITAR.
>> THAT'S SOMETHING ELSE.
>> HE THINKS I CAN LOOK
AWESOME HOLDING IT.
I AM BILLY RAY.
DO I HAVE TO DO MUCH ELSE?
>> HE JUST LOOKS AWESOME.
>> HOW DID LARRY KING'S SHOW
GET ALL -- SHOULDERS GET UP
PAST HIS EARS?
I THINK HIS SUSPENDERS ARE TOO
TIGHT.
>> IF YOU TOOK THE SUSPENDERS
OFF HE WOULD EXPAND TO THE
SIZE OF A GIANT BOUGH --
BALLOON AND FLY AWAY.
>> IT IS HOLDING HIS BODY
PARTS TOGETHER.
>> YOU SAID JUSTIN BIEBER WAS
DRAG RACING WITH HIS DAD, I
LITERALLY PICTURED JUSTIN
BIEBER AND HIS DAD IN HEELS
RUNNING DOWN THE RACEWAY.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT DRAG RACING
IS.
>> THEY ARE IN CARS AND YOU
RACE FOR THE PINK SLIP WHICH
ALSO SOUNDS VAGUELY ***.
BUT NO, IT IS WHEN TWO CARS
ARE RACING.
>> PINK SLIP?
>> THE PINK SLIP IS THE
OWNERSHIP OF THE CAR.
SO IF YOU WIN YOU GET THE PINK
SLIP OF THE CAR.
THAT'S WHAT DRAG RACING IS.
>> EXCEPT IT WAS A RENTAL
CAR.
>> WELL THEN YOU CAN'T GIVE UP
THE CAR BECAUSE YOU DON'T OWN
IT.
>> MAYBE HE WAS DRAG RACING
AVIS.
YOU NEVER KNOW.
MAYBE THAT'S WHY HE WAS
RACING.
>> THAT IS GENIUS.
IF YOU BANISH WILL CRIME
VANISH?
A LAWMAKER IS PROPOSING A
UNIQUE SOLUTION TO DEALING
WITH SOME CRIMINALS, BANISH
THEM.
BOULDER COUNCILMAN SAYS HE WAS
READING SOMETHING CALLED
SHAKESPEAR WHEN IT STRUCK
HIM.
THE CITY FULL OF REPEAT
OFFENDERS FOR THINGS LIKE
PEAKING IN THE BUSHES OR
BRAWLING.
AND IT WOULD BE LESS COSTLY
AND MORE EFFECTIVE TO GET RID
OF THEM INSTEAD OF JAILING
THEM.
IT WOULD SEND THE MESSAGE THAT
WE DO NOT FIND THE BEHAVIOR
ACCEPTABLE.
GO TO A DIFFERENT PLACE WHERE
YOU WILL HAVE TO REFORM YOUR
BEHAVIOR TO GET THE THINGS YOU
NEED IT LIFE.
REJOIN US WHEN YOU HAVE
LEARNED TO BEHAVE.
IT WORKS.
ON WEDNESDAY ONE WAS LEAD OUT
OF TOWN.
>> I THINK I KNOW THAT LADY.
>> THIS IDEA SEEMS INCREDIBLY
SIMPLE.
WHY HASN'T IT BEEN DONE.
IT IS LIKE KICKING HECKLERS
OUT OF A CLUB.
>> YEAH, BUT THAT GUY WAS
PROBABLY REALLY HIGH WHEN HE
WROTE THAT LAW.
THAT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE
SOMETHING YOU CAN EVEN DO.
>> WHAT DO YOU SAY YOU HAVE TO
LEAVE THE CITY?
>> THAT'S MY POINT.
NOBODY HAS TRIED IT.
>> IT IS LIKE THE OLD WEST.
YOU HAVE UNTIL SUN DOWN TO GET
OUT OF TOWN.
>> AND EVERYBODY DID.
IT GOES TO WHAT YOU SAID.
PERHAPS WE SHOULD BE MAKING
THE LAWS WHEN WE ARE HIGH
BECAUSE NOBODY MAKES THOSE
QUESTIONS UP.
>> IF I GOT KICKED OUT OF
COLORADO FOR PEEING IN A BUSH
I WOULD STAND ON THE BORDER
AND PEE BECAUSE I HAVE GREAT
TRAJECTORY.
IS THAT PES?
IS THAT POSSIBLE?
>> WE CAN'T PROVE IT HERE, BUT
MAYBE NEXT WEEK WE WILL FLY
OUT AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS.
JEDEDIAH, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
>> YOU CAN'T DO THIS.
IT WOULD COST MONEY TO
ENFORCE.
AND THEN YOU WOULD NEED
SECURITY TO SEE IF PEOPLE
RE-ENTER THE CITY.
IT WOULD COST MONEY TO MAKE
SURE THEY DON'T COME BACK IN
BEFORE THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO.
>> YOU GET THEM TO A PLACE,
ANOTHER CITY, AND THEN HE OR
SHE WANDERS AROUND AND PEAS
THERE.
AND THEN THAT CITY --
INEVITABLY --
>> SO THERE IS NO WHERE TO
GO?
>> THE SURROUNDING CITIES
CAN'T BE HAPPY ABOUT THIS.
ALL OF THE PLANTS ARE DYING.
IT IS LIKE, NO, KEEP IT IN
YOUR OWN CITY.
>> IT IS LIKE YOU ARE PASSING
THE BUSH PEER TO ANOTHER
CITY.
IT IS A SHARE OF COMMITMENT.
>> THAT'S TERRIBLE.
WHY NOT JUST BUILD MORE
TOILETS?
THAT'S A SPECIFIC PROBLEM THAT
MAYOR HAD IN HIS NEIGHBORHOOD.
HE SAID YOU KNOW WHAT?
I AM TIRED OF THESE KIDS
PEAKING IN MY BUSH -- PEEING
IN MY BUSHES.
>> THEY FIGURE I CAN'T PEE
ANYWHERE IN BUSHES SO I
LEARNED MY LESSON.
IS THAT WHAT YOU ARE SAYING?
>> I DIDN'T HAVE A SET
OPINION.
I JUST THOUGHT THE IDEA OF
BANISHMENT I NEVER HEARD.
>> WHEN YOU ARE YOUNGER AND
GOT IN TROUBLE YOUR PARENTS
SEND YOU TO YOUR ROOM.
THEY SAID NEED TO STAY THERE
AND COME OUT WHEN YOU LEARN
YOUR LESSON.
YOU NEVER DO AND YOU SAY YEAH,
OF COURSE I DID AND YOU YOU DO
IT AGAIN AND GO BACK TO YOUR
ROOM.
HOW WILL IT BE ENFORCED?
>> YOU CAN'T ENFORCE IT.
>> YOU ENFORCE IT WHEN YOU ARE
A BARTENDER.
>> BUT THAT IS A RESTAURANT
THAT CAN ONLY HOLD SO MANY
PEOPLE.
>> BUT IT IS A MICROCOSM.
I CAN'T BELIEVE NONE OF YOU
SEE IT AS THE BEAUTIFUL IDEA I
SEE IT AS.
WHO WOULD YOU BANISH IF YOU
COULD?
>> EVERYONE SO I CAN GET PEACE
AND QUIET.
IT WOULD BE LIKE "VANILLA
SKY."
I WOULD WALK AROUND AND IT
WOULD BE COOL.
IT IS A GREAT WAY OF FREE
TRAVELING.
SAY YOU ARE IN COLORADO AND
YOU WANT TO GO TO CALIFORNIA.
YOU JUST MAKE SURE YOU GET
BANISHED WEST EACH TIME.
YOU GET BANISHED UNTIL YOU ARE
IN CALIFORNIA, AND THEN YOU
ENJOY CALIFORNIA FOR A COUPLE
YEARS UNTIL THE BANISHMENTS
WEAR OFF AND THEN GO BACK TO
COLORADO FOR FREE AND GET
BANISHED EAST.
IT IS A GREAT WAY TO TRAVEL IF
YOU DON'T HAVE A LOT OF
MONEY.
>> AROUND THE CLOCK BANISH
BUSES.
>> YOU DON'T TRUST IT?
>> NO, THEY HAVE TO GO, THEY
HAVE TO GO.
YOU CAN'T LEAVE THE CITY
BECAUSE YOU HAVE A BAD
BLADDER.
THAT'S MEAN.
WHAT ABOUT OLD PEOPLE?
>> THE OLD PEOPLE DON'T PEE
OUTSIDE.
THEY ARE IN A NICE,
COMFORTABLE SETTING WATCHING
THEIR SHOWS.
>> THEY ARE EXPENSIVE.
>> THEY ARE EXPENSIVE, BUT
THEY PROVIDE A SERVICE FOR
YOUNG PEOPLE LOOKING TO
EXPERIMENT.
THEY ARE NOT PLEASED ABOUT
BEING TEASED.
IT IS DAY NEGATIVE 36 OF --
>> ALL RIGHT.
SOME AMERICAN LUGERS ARE
ANNOYED AT A CANADIAN AD THAT
TAKES SHOTS AT THE RUSSIAN
ANTI-GAY LAWS.
HERE IT IS, HERE IT ISERS.
♪ DON'T YOU WANT ME BABY?
♪
♪ DON'T YOU WANT ME, OH ♪
♪♪ DON'T YOU WANT ME BABY?
♪♪
>> ALL RIGHT.
SO ONE LUGER SAID THEY ARE
MAKING FUN OF OUR SPORT FOR
THEIR CAUSE, AND IT DOESN'T
MAKE A LOT OF SENSE TO ME.
IF I WERE TO HUG MY DAD AND
SOMEBODY TOOK A PICTURE AND
SHOWED IT IN SLOW MOTION THEY
COULD USE IT IN A VIDEO LIKE
THAT AND THAT IS RIDICULOUS.
WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE LIKE
THAT?
GOOD QUESTION.
ANOTHER OLYMPIAN SAYS THE
DOUBLE LUGERS ARE USED TO
BEING THE BUTT OF JOKES.
AND SAYS WHAT WE ARE DOING IS
A DIFFERENT ISSUE.
WE ARE COMPETING HERE.
SURE YOU ARE.
ANOTHER AD WAS LESS SUBTLE.
♪ DON'T YOU WANT ME BABY?
♪
♪ DON'T YOU WANT ME, OH ♪
♪♪ DON'T YOU WANT ME BABY ♪♪
>> DO YOU KNOW THAT?
>> I DON'T KNOW HER.
I WISH I DO.
I WANT TO KNOW WHY THAT GUY
HUGS THE DAD FRONT TO BACK IN
A BACK AND FORTH MOTION.
THAT SEEMS LIKE A WEIRD WAY TO
HUG YOUR FATHER.
>> YOU ARE SO CLOSED MINDED.
MAYBE HE HAS A CERTAIN
PHYSICAL DEFECT WHERE HE HAS
TO LIE ON TOP OF HIS DAD WHO
IS BED RIDDEN.
>> THAT'S STRANGE, MAN.
>> YOU HAVE TO OPEN YOUR
MIND.
DON'T THEY HAVE A POINT THAT
IF YOU ARE PRO GAY RIGHTS,
JOKING ABOUT ANY CONTACT
BETWEEN MEN AS A LITTLE GAY
MEANS IT CREATES MORE OF A
BARRIER TO ACCEPTANCE.
>> I I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
>> NEITHER DO I.
I WAS TRYING TO FIGURE OUT
WHERE I WAS GOING.
IF YOU SAY THAT IS A LITTLE
GAY, THEN THAT MEANS GAYS
WOULD BE LESS LIKELY TO
PARTICIPATE IN SPORTS.
>> LIFE IS A LITTLE GAY.
>> ALL OF IT.
IT IS ALL A LITTLE GAY.
YOU WAKE UP BUTT NAKED
USUALLY.
WHO KNOWS WHO IS NAKED?
YOU DON'T GET TO CHOOSE
SOMETIMES.
>> THAT'S AN INTERESTING WAY
OF LOOKING AT THINGS.
SO EVEN BEING NAKED MEANS YOU
ARE GAY?
>> IN THE WINTER, YEAH.
I DON'T LIKE THE WINTER
OLYMPICS ANYWAY.
I THINK IT IS A WAY FOR WHITE
PEOPLE NOT TO CELEBRATE BLACK
HISTORY MONTH.
WHY NOT DO IT IN MARCH?
>> THAT IS SO TRUE.
I NEVER THOUGHT OF IT THAT
WAY.
THAT'S ANOTHER REASON TO HATE
THE OLYMPICS.
>> I HATE THE WINTER
OLYMPICS.
>> I'M WITH YOU.
>> COME ON, GETTING UPSET
ABOUT THIS IS WAY GAYER THAN
ANYTHING.
WHO CARES?
>> I DON'T KNOW, I THINK THEY
ARE MAD BECAUSE THEY ARE TIRED
OF THE JOKES.
>> MAYBE.
I DON'T GET IT EITHER.
I DON'T GET WHY YOU WOULD BE
SENSITIVE ABOUT THIS AND ONE
OF THE COMPETITORS BASICALLY
SAID WE ARE IN SPANDEX AND WE
ARE TWO GUYS AND RESTING ON
EACH OTHER.
THE JOKES WRITE THEMSELVES.
>> FUNNY.
>> IT IS FUNNY.
WHAT IS THE BIG DEAL?
>> BUT IS IT JUST TOO EASY,
JOANNE?
>> IT IS A CHEAP SHOT.
IT IS THE OBVIOUS.
IT IS THE SAME THING AS MAKING
FUN OF A MALE DANCER.
IF YOU LOOK AT THIS VIDEO
BESIDES THE ENDING PART WHERE
IT SAYS LET'S FIGHT FOR GAY
RIGHTS IT WAS UP LOADED BY
SOMEONE WHO WAS NOT A GAY
RIGHTS ACTIVIST.
IT WOULD LOOK EXACTLY THE
SAME.
>> THAT IS A GOOD POINT.
>> ESPECIALLY WITH THAT
MUSIC.
>> BUT COPING FROM AN
ACTIVIST.
SO EVERYONE LOOKS AT IT WITH
THAT LENS.
BECAUSE IT IS COMING FROM
PEOPLE WHO ARE FIGHTING FOR
GAY RIGHTS, THEY ARE LOOKING
AT IT LIKE, WE DON'T MEAN ANY
HARM.
IF IT CAME FROM SOMEBODY WHO
OPPOSED IT, WE WOULD HAVE TO
BE OUTRAGED.
>> THAT'S A GOOD POINT.
SHOULD THESE GUYS DEVELOP A
THICKER SKIN?
>> IT WILL SLOW THEM DOWN ON
THE COURSE.
>> I GET WHERE THEY ARE COMING
FROM.
THEY HAVE TO BE TIRED OF THE
CAT JOKES I MEAN LUGE JOKES.
I'M SURE IT GETS OLD FOR THEM
AND THEY WISH IT WOULD STOP.
>> SO THAT WAS A JAB AT ME AND
YOU DIDN'T EVEN COME UP WITH A
MEANINGFUL --
>> I THINK WHAT I DID WAS DREW
AN ANALOGY AND I THINK IT WAS
A GOOD ONE.
>> I GET IT.
YOU DON'T LIKE THE CAT JOKES
ANYMORE.
>> NO, NOT AT ALL.
>> I DO UNDERSTAND -- LIKE THE
ONE GUY SAYS, IT IS HACKIE.
THEY GET THIS CRAP ALL THE
TIME.
YOU REACH A POINT WHERE IT IS
LIKE, STOP.
THAT'S WHERE THEY ARE AT.
THEY ARE NOT MAD AT THE
MESSAGE OF THE VIDEO.
THEY ARE JUST LIKE WE GET IT.
YOU THINK WE LOOK GAY BECAUSE
WE ARE TOUCHING EACH OTHER.
>> I FEEL THAT IS STRANGE.
WHO IS TALKING ABOUT LUGE
EVER?
WHITE PEOPLE.
>> HOW OFTEN ARE THEY LIKE,
WOW, ANOTHER LUGE GAY JOKE?
NO I NEVER HEARD ONE BEFORE
BECAUSE I NEVER HEARD ANYONE
TALK ABOUT LUGE OTHER THAN
LUGE PLAYERS.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW.
>> LIKE A LITTLE INSTRUMENT.
>> IT IS A LUGER.
>> LUGERS, LET US GET IN ON
THE JOKE.
GIVE US A YEAR.
>> THERE IS NO WAY TO KNOW
THIS, BUT A LOT OF WHAT WE
TALK ABOUT IS LUGE.
>> THE FIRST STEP IS GETTING
TO MAKE FUN OF IT.
>> ARE PENCILS USED FOR
WRITING OR TOOLS FOR OUR
NATION'S WRUNG.
OUR 12-PART SERIES BEGINS
TOMORROW.
IS STRIPING AN ART FORM?
I DID NOTHING IN PREPARATION
FOR THIS SEGMENT BECAUSE IT IS
ABOUT STRIPING SO
>>> DOES ART PLAY A ROLE WHEN
GRIPPING THE POLE?
STRIP CLUBS MUST NOW PAY TAXES
BECAUSE OF THE ENTERTAINMENT
BY THE TOP HEAVY ENTERTAINMENT
OF THE STRIPPERS.
IT IS *** FANTASY AND NOT
DANCE.
STRIPPERS TESTIFIED ABOUT THE
SKILL REQUIRED FOR THEIR
ROUTINES IN A BID BY THEIR
EMPLOYERS TO GET AROUND THE
SALES TAX.
A LOOPHOLE WAIVED THE TAXES
FOR THE LIVE DRAMATIC
CHOREOGRAPHED OR MUSICAL
PERFORMANCE.
BUT THE JUDGE WASN'T
INTERESTED IN THE ARTIST REOF
*** SHAKING.
THIS CASE INVOLVES CHARGES FOR
ADMISSION INTO A PLACE OF
AMUSEMENT.
A TYPICAL CHICK.
IS STRIPING REALLY NOT ART?
HISTORY TELLS US OTHERWISE AS
THIS "RED EYE" VIDEO SHOWS.
>> THE ART OF STRIPING BEGAN
2,000 YEARS AGO.
STRIPING COMES FROM THE GREEK
WORD MEANING A FORM OF ART AND
*** FANTASY.
THE WORLD'S FIRST ***
DANCER WAS VENUS.
SHE WAS CREATED BETWEEN 130
AND 100BC.
THE FIRST MALE STRIPPER CAME
CENTURIES LATER AND KNOWN AS
DAVID.
HE TOO WAS CELEBRATED FOR HIS
ARTIST REAND FLEXIBILITY.
NO ONE KNOWS WHO DID THIS
SCULPTURE.
IN THE EARLY 20th CENTURY
*** DANCING WAS CONSIDERED
HIGH ART AND ATTENDING
PERFORMANCES WAS FOR ONLY THE
WEALTHY.
EVERY STRIPPER DREAMED OF
REMOVING HER CLOTHES AT
CARNEGIE HALL.
THE MOST PRESTIGIOUS STAGE IN
THE WORLD.
AND THEN STRIPING WOULD CHANGE
FOREVER WITH THE POLE.
WE WILL HAVE PART TWO WITH
STRIPING ENDEAVORS.
>> I LEARNED A LOT.
AS A TV SHOW DO WE HAVE TO
BLUR DAVID'S GENITALS?
>> IT SHOULDN'T BE TOO HARD.
>> THAT'S TRUE.
BACK THEN THINGS WERE
DIFFERENT.
MICHAEL, MEN GO TO STRIP CLUBS
BECAUSE THEY LOVE THE
DANCING.
WHY ISN'T THAT ART?
>> IT IS ART WE ENJOY.
>> STRIPING IS ART WHEN IT IS
DONE WRONG.
IF YOU ARE LOOKING AT A
STRIPPER AND YOU SAY, BOY,
THAT IS EXPRESSIVE.
THAT MEANS YOU ARE NOT TIPPING
THAT LADY.
ONLY THE WORST STRIP CLUBS --
>> JEDEDIAH, WHO IS THE JUDGE
TO SAY WHAT IS ART AND WHAT
ISN'T?
IS THIS AN ATTACK ON
STRIPPERS?
>> I THINK THAT IF THE JUDGE
HAD BEEN A MAN YOU WOULD BE
BREE -- YOU WOULD HAVE GOT A
COMPLETELY DIFFERENT RULING.
ANYONE WHO HAS BEEN TO A STRIP
CLUB KNOWS SOME IS ART AND
SOME ISN'T.
IT DEPENDS ON THE DANCER.
ANYONE WHO HAS TAKEN A POLE
DANCING CLASS, AND I KNOW YOU
HAVE, GREG, THAT IS HARD
WORK.
THE AB MUSCLES, IT IS BETTER
THAN GOING OUT FOR A RUN.
I GIVE THESE GIRLS PROPS.
>> IT IS VERY DIFFICULT,
UNNECESSARY WORK.
>> I DON'T THINK THE POLES HAS
ADDED ANYTHING.
>> I AM JUST WAITING FOR
STRIPING TO BECOME AN OLYMPIC
SPORT.
>> THEY TRIED.
>> WHAT SEASON IS THAT A?
>> SUMMER JIE. THEY TRIED TO
GET POLE DANCING IN.
>> JOANNE YOU CAN ANSWER
ANOTHER QUESTION IF YOU LIKE.
IS IT ART?
WAIT, YOU MUST KNOW SOME
STPPERS IN YOUR LINE OF
WORK.
>> I ACTUALLY LIVE BY THE
PLACE THERE ON THE WEST SIDE.
>> WHAT IS THE ACT ADDRESS?
>> I REALLY DON'T THINK THE
AUDIENCE, LIKE YOU SAID, CARES
ABOUT CHOREOGRAPHY.
IF THEY DO, THEN THEY WOULD BE
GOING A BROADWAY REVIEW.
THEY WOULDN'T BE GOING TO THE
STRIP CLUB.
>> YOU CAN'T ***
THERE.
I FOUND OUT.
>> REALLY?
>> NO, TRUST ME I KNOW.
>> YOU HAVE TO STAY IN YOUR
SEAT.
YOU CAN'T GET UP ON THE
STAGE.
>> I THINK IT IS FROWNED
UPON.
>> AGAIN IT IS ONE OF THOSE
THINGS YOU HAVE TO WORK
THROUGH.
>> THEY BANISH YOU.
>> THEY DO BANISH YOU.
>> AND YOU HAVE TO GO TO THE
NEXT THEATER.
>> IF ARE YOU STANDING AT THE
BORDER --
>> I SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE IT
DURING "DEATH OF A SALESMAN."
THERE WAS NOTHING *** ABOUT
IT AND THERE WAS NO DANCING.
ANDY, CAN IT BE ART IF THERE
IS A TWO DRINK MINIMUM AND A
COVER?
>> SURE, WHY NOT?
>> THAT'S WHAT I WOULD DO.
>> I DON'T THINK IT WOULD MAKE
A DIFFERENCE.
>> I LEARNED A COUPLE THINGS.
THE HUSTLER CLUB SELLS WHAT
THEY CALL SCRIPT, BEAVER
BUCKS.
YOU BUY BEAVER BUCKS THAT
YOU -- THAT'S WHAT THEY CALL
THEM.
YOU USE THEM TO GET LAB -- LAP
DANCES.
THEY PUT A 20% SURCHARGE.
YOU PAY $120 AND YOU GET $100
OF BEAVER BUCKS, BUT THEN THEY
DON'T WANT TO PAY TAXES.
SO ALREADY IT IS LIKE, NO, YOU
ARE DOING THAT --
>> THAT'S TERRIBLE.
THAT IS TERRIBLE.
>> BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY I
LEARNED MONDAY THROUGH FRIDAY
THE HUSTLER COVER CHARGE IS
$20.
AND ON SATURDAY IT IS $25.
ON SUNDAYS, NO COVER CHARGE.
>> THAT'S NICE.
>> IT IS THE LORD AS DAY.
THAT IS WHEN THE STATUS
STRIPPERS ARE STRIPING.
IT IS ON A SUNDAY.
>> I WENT TO A STRIP CLUB ON
THANKSGIVING NIGHT.
>> THIS LAST THANKSGIVING?
>> YEAH, MAN.
THE GIRLS WORKING ON THAT
NIGHT.
THE WORST PART IS WORKING AND
NOT MAKING ANY MONEY.
>> HE IS SUPPORTING THE
ECONOMY.
>> THAT'S LIKE PHILANTHROPY.
YOU WERE GIVING THEM SOME
EMOTIONAL SUPPORT.
>> I AM WRITING IT OFF.
>> BEAUTIFUL.
YEAH, THERE IS A LOT OF TURKEY
PUNS.
>> I CAN'T.
>> WHY BOTHER THEN?
COMING UP, WHAT IS THE
DIFFERENCE?
WE WILL ALL DIE SOME DAY.
SHOULD HAVE READ THAT TEASE
EARLIER.
IS KRISTEN STEWART WRITING
POETRY?
WE WILL HAVE A DISTINGUISHED
GUEST READ HER WORK.
>>> HER NAME WAS LAME.
I SPEAK OF AN OHIO WOMAN, IS
THERE ANY OTHER KIND, WHO HATE
I HAD HER NAME SO MUCH SHE
LITERALLY CHANGED IT TO SEXY.
SHE IS SEXY.
SHEILA CRABTREE CALLS HER
GIVEN NAME THE UGLIEST ONE OUT
THERE AND TOLD A JUDGE SHE
WANTED SOMETHING FUN AND FREE
SPIRITED AND THE CHANGE WOULD
MAKE HER COMPLETE.
THE 41-YEAR-OLD SAID IF THE
COURT DIDN'T ALLOW HER REQUEST
SHE WOULD KILL ANDY LEVY.
SADLY THE JUDGE COMPLIED.
I WAS JUST SEEING IF YOU WERE
LISTENING.
EVERYBODY CALLS HER SEXY,
JEDEDIAH.
WAIT A MINUTE.
JEDEDIAH.
THAT'S A FUNNY NAME.
>> SHOULD I BECOME SEXY
BEILA.
>> IS THIS GOING TO CHANGE HER
LIFE AT 41?
>> IT COULD.
LOOK, IF SHE FEELS LIKE HER
NAME DEFINES HER AND SOMEBODY
CALLING HER SEXY -- YOU ARE
GOING TO BE CALLED SEXY ALL
THE TIME.
WOMEN LIKE TO BE CALLED SEXY.
NOW EVERYBODY TIME SOMEBODY
TALKS TO HER IT WILL BE SEXY.
>> THEY WILL NEVER KNOW.
THEY WILL SAY, SEXY.
>> IF PEOPLE AREN'T CALLING
YOU SEXY AFTER 40 YEARS, GIVE
IT UP.
>> IT IS SO TRUE.
I AM NEVER GOING TO BE TALL.
I AM 49.
I AM NOT GOING TO CHANGE MY
NAME TO TALL.
>> IT IS SOMETHING SHE CAN
CHANGE.
HEIGHT YOU CAN'T CHANGE.
>> WELL THANK YOU.
>> AS FAR AS I'M AWARE OF.
>> THERE ARE THINGS YOU CAN
DO.
THERE ARE STRETCHING
EXERCISES.
>> PUMPS.
>> I TRIED.
24R* IS A CERTAIN -- THERE IS
A RACK YOU CAN RENT.
IT TAKES TIME AND EFFORT.
>> STILTS.
>> LET'S GET OFF THE HEIGHT
THING.
JOANNE YOU JOKED HER NAME WAS
TERRIBLE.
WHAT IS YOUR LAST NAME?
>> IT IS LONGER THAN YOURS,
YES.
>> IT IS NOT MY LAST NAME.
IT IS WHAT I HAVE TO DO SO I
DON'T HAVE TO PAY TAXES.
ISVEE N. NRESEXY CRABTRE G
OPPO