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TONIGHT ON...
[ FOOTSTEPS ]
PAT O'BRIEN...
ROCKY, I'M GOING TO ASK YOU
IT'S NOT JUST FOR ME. IT'S FOR THOSE KIDS.
AND JAMES CAGNEY.
YOU'RE ASKING ME TO GO TO THAT CHAIR YELLOW.
I CAN'T DO THAT.
IT'S NOT JUST FOR ME.
THE KIDS, THEY LOOK UP TO YOU.
THEY'LL TURN TO A LIFE OF CRIME.
THANKS, BUT NO THANKS, RABBI JERRY.
NO, I DON'T WANT TO SIT IN THAT CHAIR.
DON'T MAKE ME SIT IN THAT CHAIR!
OT!
I DO
NO! NO! PLEASE!
HI, WELCOME TO "FURNITURE TO GO."
AND I DON'T KNOW WHO I AM,
BUT DON'T HOLD IT AGAINST ME.
AND THIS IS A PIECE OF ANH-ANH
IN OTHER WORDS -- JUNK.
BUT OVER THE NEXT TWO SHOWS,
WE WILL TAKE IT FROM ANH-ANH TO ANH-HUH.
WE'RE GOING TO PUT IN NEW SPRINGS, NEW WEBBING.
EVERYTHING TO DRIVE YOU CRAZY
OVER THE NEXT TWO SHOWS.
UPHOLSTERY.
HEY, WHAT'S THAT YOU'RE HOLDING THERE?
THIS? I'M GLAD YOU ASKED.
IT'S A WHEEL FROM THIS VICTORIAN CHAIR.
IT'S A WOON WHEEL.
THERE WERE FOUR OF THEM, BUT WE GOT RID OF THEM.
MY AUNT MATHILDA HAD THAT
ON THE END OF THE LEG.
IS THAT THE AUNT YOU CALLED A
SHE WAS A PIRATE WITH A PARROT.
FIRST WE HAVE TO GO FOR SOME SUPPLIES.
LET'S GO NOW!
WE'RE GOING TO LEAVE.
[ BELL RINGS ]
LESTER!
HEY, LESTER.
JOE AND...
ED.
ED. THAT'S RIGHT.
I THOUGHT FOR A MINUTE HE WAS SOMEBODY ELSE.
WE NEED SOME SUPPLIES.
FINE.
WE'VE COME TO HE RIGHT PLACE.
ABSOLUTELY.
THIS IS THE BEST PLACE IN THE CITY.
ER JOBBING.
GO SEE DAVE OVER THERE.
THE REALITY CHECK THAT IS UPHOLSTERY SUPPLIES
AT QUAKER JOBBING.
HI, DAVE.
HI, DAVE. HOW ARE YOU?
HOW ARE YOU?
WE'RE DOING A CHAIR.
WE NEED SPRINGS. WE NEED DACRON.
WE NEED COTTON BATTING.
ALL KINDS OF STUFF.
AND SOME BURLAP. SOME MILTON BURLAP.
VERY FUNNY.
SPRINGS FIRST, THOUGH, DAVE.
ALL RIGHT, COME WITH ME
AND I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT I GOT IN HERE.
OKAY, WE'LL START WITH THESE SPRINGS OVER HERE.
THE VALLEY OF THE SHADOW OF SPRINGS.
THIS IS A NUMBER TWO.
THIS IS THE MOST POPULAR SIZE
WE HAVE FOR SEATS.
I LIKE POPULAR THINGS.
GIVE US A DOZEN OF THOSE.
I REMEMBER THESE SPRINGS FROM THE PAST.
UH-HUH?
OVER HERE I HAVE THE BURLAP AND THE MUSLIN
AND THE STUFF YOU'RE INTERESTED IN.
I HAVE MUSLIN UNBLEACHED.
THE CAMBRIC COMES WOVEN AND NONWOVEN.
I HAVE SAGLESS IN 30 AND 36 INCH,
AND I HAVE 40-INCH, 10-ONCE BURLAP.
GIVE ME A 36 BURLAP, A NONWOVEN CAMBRIC,
AND 25 YARDS OF MUSLIN.
25 YARDS OF EACH BE ENOUGH FOR YOU?
THAT'S ENOUGH FOR A LOT OF SHOWS, RIGHT?
YEAH, YOU CAN DO A LOT WITH THAT.
THE HORSEHAIR AND...
THE FILL. VARIOUS FILLS.
THAT'S UPSTAIRS.
WE'LL HAVE TO TAKE A RIDE ON THE ELEVATOR.
SEE, THIS HOLDS IN THE FILL,
AND WE GOT SOME FILL TO HOLD IN.
WALK THIS WAY.
DO WE HAVE TO?
YOU CAN WALK UP IF YOU WANT,
BUT IT'S A LONG WAY TO GO.
OH, LOOK,
"OTIS' FIRST TRY," IT SAYS.
"NEBUCHADNEZZAR WAS HERE."
OH, MY GOD! LOOK IT UP HERE.
LOOK AT ALL THE BODIES!
Feldman: THERE'S A NICE ELEVATOR RIDE.
ONLY TOOK ABOUT 20 MINUTES.
I SAW THE PRISONER OF CASTLE MARE
BACK THERE.
RIGHT HERE I GOT PLAIN DACRON.
THAT'S A MORE MODERN FILL.
THAT'S VERY MODERN.
THEN I HAVE COTTON.
WHICH IS THE TRADITIONAL SOFTNESS.
THE COLONEL SANDERS STUFF.
THIS IS THE HAIR YOU'RE INTERESTED IN.
THIS IS 100% HAIR. THIS IS GOOD STUFF.
THAT'S HORSEHAIR.
THERE'S SOME PALOMINO IN THERE.
FEELS A LITTLE LOOSE.
THIS IS REAL, THOUGH. THIS IS REAL HORSEHAAR.
WHEW!
RIGHT BEFORE THEY HIT THE ALPO FACTORY.
THIS IS ROLLS OF POLY.
THIS COMES IN 1/2 AND 1 INCH.
WE NEED 2-INCH FOAM.
LET'S TAKE A RIDE BACK DOWNSTAIRS.
I GOT A BUNDLE ON THE TABLE.
I CAN CUT IT FOR YOU RIGHT NOW.
AND WE'LL TAKE A LITTLE BIT OF EACH.
JUST LIKE BUTTER.
OH, MIGHTY IMPRESSIVE!
OKAY, WHICH ONE OF YOU CLOWNS
IS GOING TO PAY THE BILL?
UM...
NOW WE'RE READY,
BUT AS WITH ANY UPHOLSTERY PROJECT
OR REUPHOLSTERY PROJECT,
YOU HAVE TO FINISH THE WOOD.
WHAT IF THE WOOD DOESN'T NEED IT?
YOU DIDN'T LET ME FINISH.
WHAT IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO?
ANY TIME YOU PUT NEW FABRIC ON,
YOU HAVE TO REPAIR AND FINISH THE WOOD FIRST.
THAT MEANS WE GOT TO TAKE OFF
ALL THIS OLD FABRIC AND STUFFING,
AND THEN YOU'LL HAVE SOMETHING
AS OLD AND AS DIRTY...
TRY WEARING A DUST MASK.
WEAR A DUST MASK
'CAUSE IF YOU DON'T, ALL THAT STUFF,
TO B
THAT'S HORSEHAAR IN THERE.
YOU KNOW, THE TECHNICAL TERMINOLOGY IN UPHOLSTERY
IS "HARKING OUT ROYAL."
RIP OFF THE TRIM.
RIP OFF THE TRIM FIRST.
AND UNDER THE TRIM
YOU'LL FIND THESE UPHOLSTERY TACKS.
THAT TRIM -- THANK YOU.
THAT TRIM IS HIDING THE UPHOLSTERY TACKS,
SO YOU'LL NEED A STAPLE PULLER,
LIKE THIS YOUNG MAN HERE.
AND THIS OLD MAN HERE.
AND A CLAW.
AND YOU JUST START PULLING ALL THE TACKS OUT.
NOW, FOR FIRST-TIMERS,
I WOULD SUGGEST TAKING THIS OUT CAREFULLY!
HEY, DON'T TELL I TA
YOU LIE LIKE A RUG, MARINE.
AND YOU TAKE THIS OUT CAREFULLY
SO AS TO SAVE THE OLD PATTERN.
BECAUSE THE EASIEST WAY
TO DO THAT NEW PATTERN-CUTTING...
SEE, WOU
THAT THEY PUT THIS FABRIC OVER THE TOP OF THIS STUFF?
YES, THEY DID. IT'S LAYER UPON LAYER.
BEN FRANKLIN SAT HERE.
SMELLS LIKE HIM.
WHEW!
SMELLS LIKE THE SPIRIT OF '76 IN HERE.
SO YOU TAKE THIS OUT CAREFULLY.
AVE.
BUT THIS HERE WE WANT TO SAVE.
THIS IS HORSEHAAR RIGHT HERE.
I SAID THAT ALREADY.
AND UNDER THAT --
SEE, THIS IS ACTUALLY SEWN --
WAIT A MINUTE, SON.
IT IS SEWN TO A BURLAP SANDWICH
WHICH HAS MORE STUFFING INSIDE.
THIS IS A BIG TRISCUIT.
IT HAS A SELF-CONTAINED EDGE ROLL.
AS WE ALWAYS SAY --
WITH SIX, YOU GET EDGE ROLL.
THAT'S SO FUNNY.
IT WASN'T FUNNY IN '73.
WAS IN DON KNOTTS' FILM.
NO, IT WASN'T.
IT WAS WITH BRIAN KEITH.
"HOW TO FRAME A FIG" WAS WITH DON KNOTTS.
THIS IS WHAT'S REALLY BEEN MADE.
AND WE'RE GOING TO TRY AND SAVE THIS.
TAKE
NOW, WE'RE READY TO STRIP THE FINISH
OFF THE CHAIR.
WHAT ARE THESE?
THIS IS THE FRETWORK
THAT GOES UNDERNEATH THE ARM PADDING,
AND IT HAD FALLEN OFF A LONG TIME AGO.
WE HAD THIS,
AND THIS IS WHAT WE'RE GOING TO THROW
INTO A VAT OF LACQUER THINNER.
A PAN.
A PAN.
NOT EXACTLY A VAT.
PUT THAT IN THERE ALONG WITH THIS.
SEE THIS?
THIS IS THE APPLIQUE
FROM THE OTHER SIDE
THAT HAD FALLEN OFF.
SO WE'LL THROW THAT IN THERE.
SEE THAT THERE?
HOLD IT THERE.
SEE THAT THERE?
YEAH, I GOT IT.
WE'LL REPAIR THIS AFTER WE DO THE STRIPPING.
WOULDST THAT WE COULD PUT THE WHOLE CHAIR
INTO THE VAT.
DIP IT INTO SOMETHING.
YOU CAN HAVE SOMETHING DIPPED IF YOU WANTED TO.
BUT WITH A CHAIR LIKE THIS I WOULDN'T CHANCE IT.
BECAUSE IF YOU DIP IT
AND THE PERSON WHO'S DOING THE DIPPING
DOESN'T KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING,
MAYBE THEY'RE A DIP,
YOU'LL GET A CHAIR IN PIECES.
THEY'LL PUT IT IN ON TISH A'BAV
AND TAKE IT OUT SHROVE TUESDAY.
SO WHAT DO WE DO FIRST?
FIRST YOU'RE GOING TO PUT ON SOME GOGGLES.
NOT ME.
I'VE BEEN TAKING THESE TACKS OUT SINCE PURIM.
YOU GOT THE GLOVES.
AND NOW YOU TAKE THE REMOVER.
WE PUT SOME OF THIS LOVELY ORANGE-TYPE REMOVER.
AND WE'RE PATTING IT ON.
WELL, WE AREN'T. HE IS.
I'M STILL TAKING OUT TACKS.
AND I'LL CONTINUE TO TAKE OUT TACKS
FOR THE NEXT SIX DAYS OR SO.
NOW, YOU SEE THIS?
THIS IS GOING TO GO ON,
AND YOU LET THIS SIT FOR A LITTLE WHILE.
T,
THEN IT WILL BE...
I WISH YOU COULD PAT IT ON THE TACKS
AND HAVE IT REMOVE THE TACKS.
WOULDN'T THAT BE SOMETHING!
NOW THERE'S A PRODUCT!
DISSOLVES THE TACKS BUT LEAVES THE WOOD INTACT.
AND DOES YOUR TAXES.
NOW YOU'RE TAXING ME.
?
IT'S WORKING.
I KNOW IT'S WORKING BECAUSE IT'S TURNING BLACK
BUT IT DOESN'T SEEM TO BE REVEALING ANYTHING.
INISH.
IT COULD BE AN OLD BLACK SHELLAC.
WHICH BILLY DANIELS HAD THE BIG HIT ON.
I PREFER THE LOUIS PRIMA.
IT CAN ACTUALLY BE A CASEIN.
THAT'S WHERE YOU GAMBLE.
IT'S A VERY STUBBORN FORM OF FINISH
THAT THEY DID IN THE OLDEN DAYS.
IN THE WAY OLDEN DAYS.
SO WE'LL TRY SOMETHING.
I'LL PUT THESE GLOVES ON
L TRY
I GOT A BUCKET OF THEM HERE.
I'M GOING TO PUT GOGGLES ON,
AND LET'S SEE WHAT WE CAN DO HERE.
YOU STILL WILL SEE THE DIFFERENCE
BETWEEN THIS SIDE AND THAT SIDE.
OH, DEFINITELY.
IF YOU'RE NOT IN A WORKSHOP OR A STUDIO
WHERE OTHER PEOPLE CLEAN UP,
YOU MIGHT WANT TO PUT A TARP DOWN
WHEN YOU DO THIS STUFF.
NOW, SOME PEOPLE MAY BE SAYING...
"WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS
WHEN THEY COULD BE OUT HAVING REAL JOBS?"
WELL, BUT THERE'S ALL THOSE CARVINGS IN THERE.
OH, GOODNESS GRACIOUS.
IT DOES START TO LOOK BETTER.
IF YOU CAN'T TELL, TAKE MY WORD FOR IT.
IT LOOKS BETTER. IT DOES LOOK BETTER.
AND ED'S BEE MONITORING E
YES, IT DOES LOOK BETTER.
IT LOOKS BETTER.
IT LOOKS CLEAN.
NOW, WE COULD FINISH THIS.
NOW YOU GOT A PROBLEM.
GET THE BRUSH.
YOU GOT THE GONG BRUSH HERE.
I GOT TO TAKE THE GLOVE OFF FOR THIS.
YOU BRUSH OUT AS MUCH AS YOU CAN.
OOH.
YES, SIR.
AWAY FROM ME, PLEASE.
YOU'RE SITTING THERE,
YOU'RE GOING TO GET SPRITZED.
THIS CAN'T TURN.
I CAN'T DO MY PETE BARBUDY.
NOW LOOK, WE GOT ALL THIS OUT.
BUT I NOTICED, JOE --
SETTING UP THE NEXT ROUTINE --
THAT THERE'S STILL SOME CHIPS
IN THE LITTLE CARVINGS THERE.
HOW EVER WILL YOU GET THEM OUT?
YOU ARE RIGHT, SIR.
I READ THAT NICELY.
WILD, FUNNY STUFF.
LOOK, YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS?
YES.
THIS IS AN AIR HOSE.
WE HAVE AN AIR COMPRESSOR.
WE HAVE AN AIR COMPRESSOR THIS TIME.
IT'S ON LOAN.
THIS IS A GREAT DEVICE 'CAUSE IT BLOWS AIR.
SECRET.
SEE, YOU CAN BLOW THOSE CHIPS
OUT OF THOSE CARVINGS,
OR IF YOU'RE A REAL MOVIE BUFF LIKE ED AND I,
YOU CAN RECREATE SOME FAMOUS SCENES
FROM OLD SILENT MOVIES.
NOW I WILL PART THE RED SEA
SO WE CAN GET THE HECK OUT OF HERE.
OH, THERE'S ONE IN MY EYE!
YOU SHOULD WEAR GOGGLES WITH THIS.
WE WANT SOME LACQUER THINNER.
WHICH HAS BEEN USED ABOUT SIX TIMES ALREADY.
AND WE'RE GOING TO RUB.
NOW I SEE THE RED COMING THROUGH.
YOU CAN SEE THAT NOW.
THAT'S A MAHOGANY UNDER THERE.
IT WILL HAVE A NICE AGED, BURNISHED LOOK.
WAIT A MINUTE. LET ME GET THE BLOWGUN.
NO! GOODBYE.
NOW OUR CHAIR HAS BEEN STRIPPED AND REFINISHED.
FOR THE SAKE OF TIME,
WE'VE COMPLETED THE REFINISHING OFF CAMERA.
WHAT WE DID AFTER OUR FINAL WASH
WAS WE SHELLACKED IT WITH THE UBIQUITOUS SPIT COAT.
THAT'S ONE PART SHELLAC,
FIVE PARTS DENATURED ALCOHOL.
AND THEN WE VARNISHED WITH A QUICK-DRY VARNISH.
APPLYING TWO COATS,
L.
THEN WE BUFFYIED AND JODYIED
AND WAXED THE ENTIRE THING.
NOW WE'RE READY TO REPAIR.
WE'RE GOING TO DO SOME REPAIRS RIGHT HERE.
LET'S GO BACK HERE AND DO REPAIRS.
YOU CAN SEE SOME CLAMPS ON HERE.
WE PUT THE FRETWORK BACK ON THIS SIDE.
NO BIG DEAL.
AND NOW WE'RE READY FOR THE SECOND F
POP THE FRETWORK OUT.
THESE EDGES, OF COURSE, HAVE BEEN...
SANDED.
SO THEY ARE READY FOR GLUE.
AND NOW WE GET YELLOW GLUE.
PUT SOME LITTLE DROPS ON HERE.
YOU CLAMP IT IN WITH TWO "C" CLAMPS.
YOU KNOW WHY THEY CALL THEM "C" CLAMPS?
BECAUSE YOU CAN SEE THEM.
THAT'S R
THEN WE CLAMP NICELY.
ORDINARILY, IF THIS WAS A NICE PIECE OF WOOD,
WE'D PUT SOMETHING IN THERE TO PROTECT IT.
BUT IT ISN'T
'CAUSE IT'S GOING TO BE COVERED BY FABRIC.
COME BACK WITH A WET SPONGE.
WE'LL WIPE THAT OFF.
MAIN THING IS TO GET THE REPAIRS DONE.
NOW WE HAVE TO DO THE BACK.
AND AFTER THAT,
WE'RE GOING TO START WITH THE WEBBING.
WE'RE GOING TO PUT THIS EAR ON, OKAY.
OKAY, NOW WE GET THE CARDBOARD.
AND GET THE CLAMP.
THIS IS A BAR CLAMP.
SEE, IT HELPS IKE THIS...
TO HAVE A FRIEND.
TO HAVE SOMEBODY. YEAH.
YOU DON'T WA
AND SEE THAT?
YOU CAN SEE THE GLUE OOZING OUT.
NOW, AS YOU TIGHTEN, YOU GOT TO MAKE SURE
THAT THIS IS BEING POSITIONED RIGHT
E VE.
TO TORQUE AS YOU TALK.
AS A PETER TORK.
NEXT, WE'RE GOING TO FINISH THE WEBBING.
OH, YOU MEAN YOU DIDN'T DO IT ALL?
YOU LEFT A PIECE OUT?
SHHH.